lmaology

New Year...New Problems...New Solutions

2007-01-02T20:24:00.000-05:00

Complications arise, as they tend to do, as life progresses one day at a time. Crawling it's way slowly from one chapter to the next. Old problems are solved, or not. New problems emerge. Old problems that go unsolved are quickened. It's a very trying time for me. There's a lot of things going on that I don't care to talk about in a public forum. Problems that I shy away from discussing. There are really too many to count. It's made me start to pray, and I'm not a religous person. My prayers are selfish and often times go unanswered, probably for that specific reason, if not that there is infact noone listening. Not to imply that there is nothing doing the listening...though I suppose that may be the case. I suppose what I mean by there is noone listening is to suggest that if there is someone there to listen, he/she/it doesn't want to listen to me. Amidst my apparent misfortune is a mirade of good luck. I have great friends who seem to have little trouble putting up with my day to day bullshit. I have a roof over my head, a decent job and I eat daily...though often not as often as I like, or to a pathetic quantity. Less, not more than I should. My stress level has climbed dramatically as the past few months have gone from bad to worse, but not so bad as to make me feel hopeless. Everything is pretty much my fault. I'm terrible with money, for one. I don't like sharing every detail of my life with those who probably deserve to hear them. I'm a big mess.

There are many people out there who have it a lot worse than me, and I'm not even really saying I have it bad. I'm just saying I wish I had it better. I wish I was a better person, in many respects of the word. I am a good person, but not good at everything. That is to say metaphysically speaking I am basically "good", I just don't excell in certain tasks, or in certain areas that I believe I should...or need to in order to improve my situation.

One problem I have is taking advice from people who seem extremely judgmental in general aspects. Don't get me wrong, I don't mind being judged. I believe it to be a natural reaction. Everyone judges and is judged to one degree or another. I just don't take being judged well. Esspecially by those who by my calculations have no right to judge me. I don't know. I think pride is killing me. I also think a lack of pride, or self-respect is also killing me. So that which I have in abundance which is doing me harm is coincidentally the wrong flavor of the same substance, if that makes any sense.

Anyway, I have no idea what the point of this is if not just to ramble on and get this out. Though there was not much depth to what I have said as far as detail and explaination, I will be able to count it off my chest as I close. Though most of you won't and can't understand exactly what I'm saying, as I didn't really elaborate, it is out there for interpretation. The bottom line is that it is out there, and that's all that really matters to me at this point. Like a sneeze, or a fart...better out than in.

-J.Janke

Happy Holidays

2006-12-30T20:17:00.000-05:00

We're coming up on the end of the year and I figured I better go ahead and post before it happens. I saw a ring around the moon tonight and that no doubt means the end of the world is near.

Christmas was okay. Jenni came down to visit and stayed for a few weeks. On Christmas eve we drove to Winston-Salem to spend the holiday with her family, who apparently doesn't really like me anymore. It's almost funny. Her brother, whom I hadn't seen in nearly half a year walked in the door and didn't say a word to me. Through dinner, the opening of presents, and as he was leaving...not one word. He and I never really hit it off, but damn. What a fucker.

Matt is supposed to be having some kind of New Years party at his new place, but I'm not entirely certain if I'll be attending due to a comment he made earlier in the day. It was one of those "I'm joking when I say this but not really" sort of things, and I havn't heard from him since. It's really just too much drama and I don't care to have that swirling around in my already busy mind.

My grandma from California sent me a Christmas card and it was much appreciated. Out of all my family she was the only one to send any kind of holiday greeting, and we're not even related by blood. It's fairly pathetic but I can't really complain as I've taken the stance...if they're not going to call me, I'm not going to call them...I just feel like it's not my responsibility to make contact with every member of my family every time there is contact to be made. It's depressing, but I'll get over it. Apparently they have. I don't need gifts, but a nod in my direction everyonce-in-a-while would be nice.

Hey kid, we still know you're alive, and still think of you from time to time.

I hope everyone who reads this finds the holiday season pleasant and without too much worry or regret. A new year is upon us, and it may be a time for some serious change. For ourselves, our country, and our world. Then again, it could just be another day on the calender. Whether it's our choice or up to fate, God, or whatever force you believe or disbelieve in...if there is changes to be made, let's all hope that they are for the most part benificial to us individually and as a collective.

Be safe on this holiday, friends and family. Safe for yourself, and safe for others. Know when you've had enough fun, and don't let the consequences of your actions effect negatively on someone elses life.

Happy holidays, once again. Be safe, once again...I'll see you next year.

-J.Janke

Fuck Parades

2006-12-12T23:28:00.000-05:00

Left my house the other day to do some laundry at the mat, pick up a few groceries, and create general havok in my small town using lasers and ninja stars. On the way out I noticed people setting up lawn chairs and coolers, little kids in over sized coats running wild with their irresponsible parents mingling among other parents entirely too close to the street on which I was driving. I thought nothing of it, finding myself immune to the odd feeling these sites may envoke in a normal person. I thought to myself, "I hate this town", and went about my business. Karma it seems had a red bead dropped on my forehead as I tried to get back home as every route was blocked by either cones, or a mob of people...the occasional police officer. I was blocked off from the street to my house. "Officer", I said walking up to a cop, "I live right over there, I need to get home." He told me he was under strict orders and couldn't let anyone through. "But I have groceries.", I explained. He told me I could park and was 'welcome' to walk home from wherever I chose to park. After ripping his head off in the safety of my imagination I grumbled under my breath, something along the lines of not remembering waking up in Nazi Germany and walked to my car. I had to park at a construction site, walk carrying groceries all the way to my house. Freezing cold. All for a fucking parade. A parade that left litter and bags of candles (don't ask, I don't have the answers) all over the roads surrounding my street. I'm fairly certain it's not within the bounds of the law, local or otherwise, to keep a man from his house...for any reason, save a chemical spill or alien attack. Needless-to-say I was pissed. Dinner was lovely though. I expressed my disgust during the parade by flickering the porch light on and off. I'm sure it annoyed atleast one person. They say if you can make a difference in just one person's life...

Challenge

2006-10-26T22:26:00.000-04:00

I've been reminded more times than I can count just how worthless I really am this past week. I don't have my dog anymore. My girlfriend and I decided to call it quits, and my employment with CDI is hanging on by a very thin thread.

-I wasn't able to give Duchess the kind of attention she needs. She was home alone too often. She barked any time anyone came over. She sheds uncontrollably. I suppose she was basically getting on the nerves of my roommate, and some of my friends. Though I was never asked to give her up, for the comfort of other people I have done so. She's staying in Winston Salem now. I miss her terribly, and can't take her back just yet. That alone crushed me.

-After leaving Winston Salem dropping Jenni and Duchess off, I didn't talk to Jenni for about two days. Not really talk anyway. A few texts, one actual phone call. She informed me she was upset and didn't really feel like talking. Neither of us were happy the two weeks she stayed. I was tossing the idea around about breaking it off. I couldn't bring myself to do it for a number of reasons. She's a good woman, for one. She also has a lot of stuff going on in her life right now, and I couldn't bring myself to put more on her by breaking it off. She ended up doing it. Through a text message no less. We still talk, keep in contact, argue, etc. This didn't help my disposition, and I'm having a real hard time dealing with it regardless of the fact that A) it's what I wanted, and B) it's for the best.

-I might be losing my job. The company is going through a down period, and though I knew a couple people were getting fired, I was informed that my job was safe. I'm a good employee, and I have a lot to offer the company, yadda yadda. Tuesday rolls around and I find myself in the office explaining why I shouldn't be fired. Defending myself, repelling all the bullshit reasons that were thrown at me with great accuracy and fervor. Now I find myself in the unique position to compete for my employment. Yesterday was the beginning, and tomorrow is my final test. I'm still not convinced that even if I execute the task with flawless percision that it will guarentee my continued employment. I will fight for my job, I just hope the fight is for the title, and not just for the entertainment of those in the position to make me dance.

I'm very depressed right now. The above mentioned is only the core of all the problems I'm having the deal with right now. I can't even begin to list everything I'm having to absorb as it would take me days just to itemize it. I think Jenni made a mistake, I think CDI is making a mistake, or perhaps I'm making the mistake in assuming that I'm worth the life I was given. Maybe dad was right. Maybe you all were. That doesn't mean that I'm not going to bleed to prove those who don't believe wrong. Pass or fail, tomorrow is going to be one hell of a day. If I don't make it, I'll have to move on. If I do, hopefully my life will begin to smooth out. I can't handle much more of this. Thanks to everyone who have so recently tattered my life. I'll only become stronger as a result, and I will always care for each and every one of you. Shit on me and I'll only clean it off and let you do it again.

-D-O-O-R-M-A-T-

Update of Lateness

2006-10-10T12:35:00.000-04:00

So anyway, over a week later...

The DC trip was fantastic. We bar hopped in Fredericksburg, walked around the MOL snapping pictures, saw Tool at the Verizon. It was fun. My only complaint was that I spent atleast 120 dollars feeding myself on the trip. Food in DC costs a lot. For example, a chili-cheese dog and a drink costs roughly 15 dollars and your soul.

Since the show things have started going downhill. Perhaps I had more fun than I deserved. My roommate is having problems at work, I won't go into detail as it is not my story to tell, but that situation has been weighing heavy on my mind. I picked up Jenni last weekend but she is getting sick. The company I work for is in financial trouble. I almost got in a car accident yesterday, needless-to-say my cat-like reflexes overcame, I hurt my shoulder in the process. I havn't got to hang out with Mike since the show, which sucks, but I know he has shit to deal with. Alyssa was sick yesterday, but I think she's feeling better already.

I wish I could go into more detail about the DC trip, but I'm feeling a little depressed and can't bring myself to really tell the tale. Unfornutaely all this shit is going on and I can't really focus on the great time that came and went and need to keep my eyes on the path ahead. The time to cover ones ass is coming up fast.

-JJanke

Weekend Outline

2006-10-01T21:06:00.000-04:00

This is a weekend outline, I'll add details later, I just don't want to forget this shit.

1. Left Home around 830 to stop at the bank, went to eat breakfast, headed to VA
2. Arrived in VA, visted with Mikes old work buddy. Funny black guy. Banana hands. Headed to Potomac Mills mall and walked around. Looked at Lego statues in the Lego Outlet. Went to Spencer's, it hasn't changed in 10 years. Same layout, same useless crap, same idiot teenagers, and the same goth kid standing in the back with socks on his wrists. Looked at impractical furniture. Went to Best Buy, saw an asian godess. I love her still.

3. Headed to Fredericksburg, spent 12 years in traffic. Met up with Eric.

4. Went to bars. Got retarded. 4 or 5, one of which was Jimmy Buffet's Cheeseburger's in Paradise.
5. Went to Eric's house. Skank came over. Kenny got a lap dance. Everyone else got nausious.

6. Woke up entirely too early. Went to TGIFridays, spent too much money on lunch. Waitress was a troll. Headed to Springfield caught the metro to DC. Walked around the MOL. Took pictures. Looked at girls, none looked back.
7. Got a cab to go to the Verizon center for the Tool show. Matt and I had to figure out what to do with the cameras. Raced through the metro, dropped off cameras at Union Station in a baggage holding area.

8. Saw Tool. Best live performance ever. 26000 lighters.
9. Slept
10. Left Fredericksburg around 11am, headed to the Crystal City mall, caught the metro at the Pentagon City station, went to Union Station to pick up cameras. Ate at a 50s style diner called Johnny Rocket or something along those lines. Walked around the station, took pictures. Went back on teh metro to Crystal City mall and walked around a bit.
10. Headed home, long drive. Got home around 8pm.

--Will add in the details later, right now we all need to rest.

-J.Janke.

p.s. I dont save drafts

Funny Feeling

2006-09-19T23:29:00.000-04:00

I have a weird feeling. It's almost like I'm depressed, but not. I feel slow, but alert. I'm on the verge of sadness yet quite happy. I can't think of a way to accurately describe it. Work was kind of hard today. We stopped off at a three-story duplex out passed swansboro to fix a few things, and install some items that were left out by whoever was there last time. After that we headed closer to the beach and did a full install on a huge house, and it took hours. There was three of us, and it took from around 1:30 to 4:30 to complete. It was strangely fulfilling, I'm fairly certain I spelled that word wrong.

Currently I am downloading Gunbound Revolution because I havn't played in ages and a couple friends have requested my company. I'll more-than-likely play really bad. Not only am I going to be a bit rusty, but my mouse needs batteries soon. The little red light is blinking, and I'm pretty sure it didn't do that the other day. I have no real way of knowing what it indicates, but I can only assume it has to do with the life of the power source.

That is all.

Road Block

2006-09-17T01:02:00.000-04:00

There is no satisfaction so great, no elation so exsquisite as making it through a Richlands road block when you're totally fucking drunk. That is all.

-J.Janke

Out Of Town

2006-09-04T22:47:00.000-04:00

I will be out of town on business for the next week, returning Friday evening. Any comments to this page, Myspace, email or gtalk will be missed until that time. If you have my celery number, give me a ring or text, if not, wait till I return. Until then.

-J.Janke

First Day

2006-07-31T18:09:00.000-04:00

Started my first day of work today. I'm tired. That's all I have to say right now.

-J.Janke

2006-07-24T22:59:00.000-04:00

It's simple and yet so very complicated. I know what I must do, yet have neither the courage nor discipline to take action. Once so very confident I find myself fighting for a scrap of dignity as I take a course that is laden with phantom signals and dark pockets that seem the harbinger of failure. Yet I proceed. Certainly it's time to grow up.

The move went well. Michael ended up meeting me about two hours into my trip to give me some company on the road. When we arrived at his house, my new home, we unpacked, cleaned out the room that would soon become mine, and caught up on the layers of life that we've experienced since we last saw eachother. I went to bed fairly early that night, but it didn't last. People came over and a clever prank was pulled on me as I was sleeping which scared me awake for the duration of the night. It was fantastic. I won't go into detail as words can't describe what exactly happened. Flawless execution.

Mid-weekend we went to Mike and Matt's parents house for a cookout. The pool was refreshing and the food was great. We had a good time.

Thursday I have an interview with the company that Matt works for about a job, hopefully it will go well, I'll keep the two of you that read this site posted as time permits. Until then.

-J.Janke

Minor Update - Ortiz vs. Shamrock - UFC 61

2006-07-09T04:46:00.000-04:00

All hopes lost. Tito Ortiz destroyed Shamrock in under two minutes. There's not much that I can say that can't be read elsewhere. This may be it for Shamrock. All the hype, and it ends like this. I missed the PPV fight, and after reading several reports on the bout, I can't say I regret it. Shamrock seems less like the legend he should be, and more like the blonde teenage karate champion in The Karate Kid that fell prey to the crane technique. Atleast the blonde kid took the loss well, unlike Shamrock, who probably cried. I don't blame him if he did. It's said that he was visibly opposing the ref's decision to call the fight after only 00:01:08 of fight time. Clearly the ref saw that Shamrock was in danger. There was no coming back from what I gather, and if the fight hadn't been stopped, more than Shamrock's pride would be injured, permanently. Sham might be drooling his protests otherwise. According to Ortiz, after the initial take down, Shamrock went limp after the first elbow blow. A lifeless mass mashed against the fence of the octagonal ring, absorbing an onslaught of abuse, driven by seven years of hatred and rivalry. Like I said, I didn't see the fight yet, so I can't say this is fact, but if you're taking elbows to the head repeatedly without so much as some defensive arm flailing, the fight's over. Most of us saw this coming. Few of us hoped Shamrock would pull it out, but doubted he could. With all the differences in opinion and hopes, I think all of us simply hoped for more. Read the report here.

A Romp Through the Wise Words of Others

2006-07-09T03:04:00.000-04:00

"Why do I allow these people to dictate my mood in this way? I don't believe I honestly care what they think of me, that is to say, how they judge me. These inside outsiders, or outside insiders, or whatever-the-hell they are have the incredible power to toxify my disposition to a dramatic degree. In reflection I'm beginning to gather that it is not the judgements of who I am or what I do or why that knocks me off keel. Clearly not. Why would it? They are in no elevated position, nor have they attained any special insight or revelation to justify nor grant credence to their statements. What I think does bother me however is the assumptions they seem to generate with no real foundation as to what is really going on. No more."

I wrote this early yesterday morning, around 4am on a scrap of paper using a standard Bic ballpoint, left-handed. There was more, but it was jumbled and angry. It named names and cast blame. In rereading what was written above, and that which I'm leaving out, I find myself able to forgive those who made me feel this way, as it is not really their fault. It is mine. I am the representative of my own disposition, and they are entitle to their opinions, as unjustified, clouded, and ignorant as they may be. This includes my father, who has played the same role many times before. I thank you, brothers and sisters, for opening my eyes in this roundabout way. I thank the brilliance of others who have inspired me to unravel the lining of what has happened in the past few weeks. The brilliance of others who helped me find the soft, juicy core in this dramatic and seemingly rotten fruit. Namely Eleanor Roosevelt, Sun Tzu, and The Big Book: Fourth Edition.

Questions? Comments? I doubt it.

-News-

-The 21st of July will mark a big day for me, and for those closest to me. I make my move. Mike should be here sometime in the morning to help me gather my belongings. I'm sure I have plenty of room in the car to make the trip, but the help is much appreciated, and will make Duchess a lot more comfortable during the ride.

I will be making trips back to Winston-Salem regularly to visit with Jenni and her family. I do it for myself and for Jenni, but I think the main reason I do it is for Duchess. She'll need to visit with her family. This is all very confusing to her as is. She's been acting strange the past few weeks. Her senses are acute and she knows something is changing. Something big. We will make the transition as easy on her, and ourselves, as we possibly can. Hopefully she'll be making trips to my new location atleast half as often, but as I'm keeping the car for a little while, it's more my responsibility than hers.

-I've changed my Myspace a little bit, but not much. I'm not really into that as much as some, but I do check it regularly, and do make small changes every-so-often.

-Fun with words-

[[below definitions credited to Dictionary.com, partially altered in text format alone]]

Naval: Of or relating to ships or shipping/Of or relating to a navy.

Navel: The mark on the surface of the abdomen of mammals where the umbilical cord was attached during gestation. Also called 'umbilicus'/A central point; a middle.

-J.Janke

2006-07-06T04:16:00.000-04:00

"Noone can make you feel inferior, without your own consent." - Eleanor Roosevelt

Lmaology News (more)

2006-06-29T00:21:00.000-04:00

I've changed a few things. Very minor things as you've probably noticed, in that you haven't noticed anything different.

New things:

- I updated the hit counter finally. It is now accurate. It still acts as a link to visit my site statistics page where you can see who's been visiting, what parts of the planet they visit from, and in most cases, their ISP, search path, refering link, entry and exit path and IP address. I like to know when Ugumbu Umbubwe (comparable to Joe Schmoe) of Nigera, Africa drops by for 13 seconds because he accidentally added a few letters while typing in his target URL.

- I added a new section to the side bar known as the 'Salient Exposition'. This new addition will feature a link leading to the post(s) that I find swell. Kind of like the Employee's Picks section at a movie rental facility, only good. So far its just one, and it's quite possible that it will stay that way. Rest assured though, if I write anything in the future that I find 'Salient Exposition' worthy, I will add the corresponding link to the list. This is just kind of my personal archive for work I feel is special. You don't have to agree, but check the list from time to time and give it/them a chance, and for the love of Chuck Norris, let me know what you think by dropping a comment. I will only be adding FUTURE entries to this list. I refuse to rifle through my archives and syphon out material from ages ago.

Today was a big day. I went by my old job to pick up a few things because my employee discount is still in effect until saturday. I woke up at 5:30 in the morning having an asthma attack and to my delight found that my inhailer was empty. Terrified and hopelessly gasping for breath I made a call to the pharmacy, which was closed. I had to tell a mechanical voice that I needed it filled. It wasn't ready for pick-up until 10:00am. Thank almighty Zeus that coffee aids in the dilation of the bronchioles. Then I got home and helped Jenni through a problem. Soon after I played a videogame called Mercenaries which I haven't touched in ages, took a 20 minutes nap, then went to class.

Keehhh OOhhhhh!

-J.Janke

Lmaology News

2006-06-27T10:30:00.000-04:00

[[updated]] - - Paragraph 4, Line 2 - -

I'm feeling a little better about what was detailed on the previous post. A swell of acceptance has lifted me slightly above sea level. As with all swells, I'm sure this one will eventually curl and violently crash on a jagged rock face. Until then, of course, my mood is elevated. I have a doctors appointment today where in I'll be asked how I'm doing by an unreceptive, if not apathetic psychiatrist and have my prescription filled for another two weeks. Yay therapy. A number I don't recognize just called, I hope they leave a message because I simply refuse to answer calls from numbers I don't recall ever seeing. It's a thing I have. It was Mike.

-Other News-

-Tito Ortiz and Ken Shamrock are schedualed to fight in the octagon July 8th at 10:00pm on Pay Per View. The cost will be nine mirrion dorruhs and I will be there. JDub seems to think Ortiz will win, and he's probably right, but Ken Shamrock is my homeboy and has been dub'd "The Worlds Most Dangerous Man'', the fact that hes almost 98 years old holds no baring on my expectation of him emerging victorious. The really great thing about this fight is that not only do these two athletes excell at their craft to a phenominal level, but they also just straight up fucking hate eachother. Blood.

-I've decided that I will begin to put together a promotion package of writing to hopefully gain employment, or a deal once I hone my craft to a razor sharp edge. It's a passion I have. Once upon a time my dream was to be a fictional writer. Weaving tales of impossible characters interacting with impossible environments and overcoming impossible odds. Clearly I still need work, and a skilled editor will be a necessity as my abilities with spelling and grammar are not, as we say in the business, worth a damn. I've decided against persuing a career as a fictional writer. I'll leave the challenge of publishing grociery store worthy novels to the masters. I instead would like to report on current events or perhaps even spill random thoughts onto a blank screen with the intent of building the illusion of interesting topics. Sadly I have no idea how to break through the shell of adversity and make my way to a steady paycheck simply by plopping down words on a computer screen. Any advice and/or help would be greatly appreciated. I've decided to recruit some of my closer friends to pimp some of my work once I get a package going to various publishers. In the meantime my simple blog will have to act as a sample, and that, I'm afraid, will have to do for now. A lot of work ahead.

-My job at Gamestop is in sever jeopardy. It's not so much that I will be fired, [[update: I got laid off, so weird, there's that jagged rock face.]] it's more a situation where the hours I require to earn a sufficient living are not currently available. I believe it's simply the fact that we are over staffed for this time of year. In addition, an MIT (Manager In Training) will be soaking up a lot of the hours while in our store learning how to run things. It usually takes a few weeks before said MIT is prepared to take the helm of his or her own store, and until that time has elapsed, a lot of my fellow employees and I will be neglected of our much needed hours. I will need to look for a second job to ease the blow of a thinning paycheck until my career as an overpayed/underskilled writer launches.

-As far as I know, my plans to move are still in motion, though the time frame I think has been extended do to problems here at home. There's still a lot of work to be done in several areas before a move is even possible. Hopefully the offer to room with my friend will still be available, otherwise I'll just have to end up staying here for a while longer. Either that, or move out of state, which I am adamantly against.

In closing, I'd just like to say thank you to those of you who continue to visit this small site. It's good to know that a few people out there enjoy reading the dribble I write on a not-so-regular basis. Either that or the few people that accidentally stumble upon the site while looking for something more interesting. Hopefully soon the domain will be up and operational, but I've not been updated on that situation in a few weeks. Keep those fingers crossed, those of you who care. I'd like to have a little space that I can finally call my own.

-J.Janke

-Google Words of the Day-

-Copious: Large in quantity; also, affording an abundant supply.
-Autocrat: A ruler with unlimited authority.
-Sedulous: Diligent in application or persuit.

The Gauntlet

2006-06-23T00:10:00.000-04:00

I'm so very tired. The people I trust the most have turned to another direction as I face one of the most difficult times in my life. The abandoned, the forsaken; these are not my titles. Pitty is not something I require, nor is weakness what I'd like to project. They have not turned against me, this isn't what I mean to say. Their actions, or lack-there-of has awakened me to a new situation. I feel that this is the time that I need to work out my problems on my own. There will be difficulties abound on the long road ahead and I hope they understand that the problems I'm facing effect my reactions on an extreme level. Everything is going to be different. I can't say for better or for worse. It's solely a time of change. Nothing more. Nothing less.

Currently I'm not sure where my life is headed. There's always room for punishment and praise no matter which direction I choose to go. This cross-roads that I've come to have been extremely difficult to understand and to deal with, difficult for me, and difficult for those around me. What do I want to do? Where do I want to go? These are questions not even I can answer. It's puzzling to me how simply and with so little effort my life has seemed to crack and displace in this way. I'm not even to a point where I can contemplate the how's and why's. I'm so preoccupied with the what's and where's.

I sit with a blank stare and look at the walls, wondering where the vertices went. How could I have neglected noticing the high-point, and reluctantly entered the plunge with such cognizance. I suppose that's just the way it goes.

Expectation is a new demon I've discovered. Grouped with pride, arrogance, wanting...expectation acts as a means to blind the perception of what may infact be good, e.g. wanting more than you have, when what you have is plenty. Perhaps not only plenty, but overflowing.

It's almost as though I'm entering a dark room, without so much as a candle to light my way. Not only that. It's as if I blew the candle out before stepping into the room. I've somehow inadvertently created whole new obstacles to the path already littered with vicissitude, the ever-changing road we call life. Some more littered than others. Maybe I could put myself in a mindset to comprehend these challenges and abrupt distortions as lifes adornment, though that in itself becomes an added encumbrance. It's all so confusing to me.

Therapy has been helpful, but as it's opened some doors to answers, it also opened the windows to new questions. Has it really been worth it? The correct answer is yes. Do I agree? I suppose we'll find out eventually.

Sobriety is an overwhelming grievance, though I know that in the long-run it will be worth it. I've been depressed and angry. I've been wandering aimlessly while on 'the right track'. Understanding is an inaccessable commodity through this phase of my life. Noone can really know what it feels like, as even those who have gone through it went through it in their own way...with their own emotions and chaotic thoughts to deal with. They've had their own perceptions and realizations while on their way. They've had their own family and friends to help and hinder them. No two people will go through it the same way, and as such, no one person can truely understand what it is I'm going through. I don't expect them to. Language, as a means of communication has never been able to encapsulate true definition for understanding as far as emotion and inward complexities goes. Neither love nor hate can be described in completion, just as my experiences in the past few months can't be defined or perceived by others. If only there was another way. Enter laser-based telepathy. Just kidding.

I've been taking care of Jenni through her difficult time, trying to maintain a semblance of strength and sanity while at the same time tending to her basic needs. She's been physically sick on top of her mental instabilities and its beginning to worry everyone. I've promised to be her structure, the very model of integrity, while crumbling away inside. She is the counter-balance. She is my support in this time of internal and external struggle. It truely is a symbiotic situation. I need her as much as she needs me right now. She's always there for me, otherwise I would have collapsed a long time ago. As funny as it may sound, Duchess has been a great help to me as well. She is truely my best friend, and her unconditional love and respect for me is more important than I can even begin to describe. I love my dog. Even with Jenni and Duchess, I'm having a real difficult time. I just wish I had more support. In addition to my help, she has her family and a few good friends that help to support her through this. With the added stress of restructuring our relationship, focusing on friendship rather than romance, and ending the relationship as a couple, needless-to-say, we have a lot to deal with. The help she recieves is appreciated by her, and by me.

I can't help but feel alone a lot of the time, but I feel that somehow, for some reason, things are as they should be. Training for the future, aquiring new strength for hardships to come, or maybe even developing a respect for the good things that I have not yet experienced and otherwise would have missed. We can only grasp relentlessly to the hope that one day soon everything will be okay. Everything will be okay. Everything will be okay. It echoes in my mind for as long as I can sustain it. It's sad, but the main pillar of my mental state is the understanding that it could be so much worse. For all intents and purposes, one final note for this entry. I am who I am, and I'll be who I'll be. Know that.

-J.Janke

The End. The Beginning.

2006-06-21T04:54:00.000-04:00

The demon has always been there. I've always known of its existence. Sleeping deep within me. It lies there quietly, motionless, saving it's strength for when the time was right. The demon feeds on the rage I feel on a day to day basis. The anger that I choose not to release on those responsible for its creation. The demon was the manifestation, and it lies there waiting.

The beating of my heart is its clock. The slower it beats the easier the demon sleeps. As it's steady rythem gains tempo the demon begins to open it's eyes. It feeds. It feeds. It sleeps.

For years the beast lays dormant. The demon has no scheme to hatch, the demon has no reason for being, it just is. It opens its eyes when circumstances permit. It feeds. It feeds. It sleeps.

The demon begins to stir at times. My eyes are its window, my hands are it's gloves, my body it's armor. The demon listens through my ears. It tastes with my tongue. It does not feed. The demon waits. It watches and listens. The demon understands me, it would have me believe, and I do.

The demon was awake today. Walking where I walk. Seeing what I see. Feeling what I feel. It was not happy. The demon spoke. I listened. What we communicate is not through words, and can't be expressed as such. The demon is full, and rested. The demon waits, and I wait with it.

I can see what you can't. I can hear. I can taste and touch the things that you can't understand. I am beyond you. Now, I am the demon.

I am the demon.

I am free and imprisoned. Shackled and unbound. I am dangerous, you see? Can you hear the unspoken as I do. Can you taste the abstract as I do? I rub conformity behind the ears and watch its leg quiver. Can you understand? You are not me.

I am the demon.

The demon must sleep. The demon closes his eyes slowly. The demons eyes will open again. The demon will feed again. One day, however, the demon will walk with my legs. My feet will be it's shoes as my hands are gloves. One day, you see.

The demon sleeps.

lmaology news

2006-06-06T13:09:00.000-04:00

-update-
Jenni and I have decided to part ways. Us being broke up and living together is too hard to deal with, so in August I'm going to share a house with a friend of mine. Giving myself two months so I can save a little bit of money and finish my treatment. Still no news on the domain other than it's still in the process of being activated. I have to leave for class in about 40 minutes, I hope it makes me feel better because my brain is going into overload thinking about all this shit.

Song of the Day: Changes by Yes

-end update-

A lot has happened since my last update. I enrolled myself in rehab to get over my drug addiction and it has been going very well. I feel like a new person after each class. I return to work (again) on Saturday which will be great. The new computers were put in, and I need to run by there sometime before my shift to watch a couple sales ring up so I know what I'm doing when I get back.

Other News-
1. The domain is purchased, in the next couple days this blog will be moved and restructured. The URL will be www.lmaology.com, nothing is there yet though. A friend of mine is setting it up for me and I will notify anyone who visits this site via my next update when its up and running.

2. My relationship with Jenni has taken a drastic turn. I won't go into detail, but it's all working out for the best. Though a difficult transition, it's already helping both of us out dramatically.

3. Rehab is going well. It's basically a class I go to Tuesday - Friday where I sit in a group of other addicts and alcoholics and discuss life, liberty, and the persuit of sobriety. I also see a psychologist once a week, which will eventually turn to once every two weeks and so on and so forth until I don't need to see him at all. He's a great guy, a tiny man we call Doctor T. I've been clean since I started the program and it feels wonderful. I don't see a relapse in my future, and look forward to living a rich life once this is all complete.

4. I've added some pictures to my Flickr page if anyone cares to take a look at them. Mostly they are pictures of my beard, and some pictures I've taken of sketches from my old old sketch books. I'm getting back into my art, and will be writing a lot more as soon as time permits. The new site will be a platform for the above mentioned, as well as the continuance of my online journal.

-J.Janke

Back to Work

2006-03-29T12:06:00.000-05:00

Today I go back to work, as the title might imply. I've been out for around a week, due to Jenni's car accident. She's doing a lot better and has the ability to drive again. She went back to work yesterday, and has a doctor's appointment today, so hopefully everything is healing up alright.

It's weird, I'm a little nervous about going back to work. Prior to this break in my schedual, I had been working between my store, and another location covering their SGA position. Still not sure if that's over, but I hope so. So walking into the store today will be like returning from a long trip. I havn't seen most of the staff in around 4 weeks, give or take.

I always hate coming back to work after a few days off. Everything's always moved around, new games are on the shelves that I didn't know were released yet. So much shit is coming out this month that I'm sure there will be plenty of times today I tell someone "nah, it's not out yet", only to have them bring me the gutted case off the wall 5 minutes later. Kingdom Hearts 2 releases today, I'm pretty sure. So that'll be fun.

This is all really exciting stuff, and I'd love to go into more detail, but I need to start getting ready for work. Le Sigh.

One Night

2006-03-26T06:09:00.000-05:00

Before I knew it, they were all dead. One moment there was a shotgun being shoved in my face, the next I'm covered in blood. Their blood. I didn't have a scratch on me. I pulled up to the gas station to pick up a pack of cigarettes and a drink. Everything seemed okay. I walk to the back of the store and brush arms in the isle with a flannel-clad individual who smelled like he had just bathed in alcohol. I payed him no mind. This is the sort you always seem to find out and in mini-marts at 3am on a Sunday morning. Before I could reach the refridgerators where they store the cold drinks, I felt an overwhelming pressure consume my neck. I was pulled back off balance and I could feel the cold of a gun barrel lifting my shirt and scraping into the flesh over my kidney. "Be cool.", he said. He spun me around with such a force that it actaully made my neck pop. This was actually the weirdest part of the night, it felt fucking fantastic. I was jolted back to reality when I was facing the opposite direction and found a shotgun in my face. I blacked out. I awoke, I can only assume, several minutes later. With my newly regained consiousness and perspective, I began to panic. I held in my hand a small, snub nosed revolver with a hint of smoke still creeping from its mouth, and through it's sides. A body lay at my feet. A man who had recently lost his face and his life. A man covered in nothing but blood, and flannel. Another man lay dead near the register. The wall behind the counter was painted in red, the cigarette rack was drenched. Thank god for cellophane. Now more than ever I needed a smoke. I reached across the counter to the blood-spattered rack to grab a pack. The cashier was huddled down behind the counter. She was clutching a small wooden club in her hand reciting the Lord's Prayer. I tried to calm her, but there's no consoling a person in this caliber state of shock. The poor girl would be traumatized for life. I on the other hand felt remarkably underwhelmed by the apparent situation which had just transpired. I lit a cigarette and dropped a few bills on the counter and walked out to my car. I put the gun in the glove-box, buckled my seat belt, and put the bitch in drive. I had no particular destination in mind. I would most certainly be followed and eventually found. If I was responsible for what happened, and not simply falling into a highly fortunate pool of statistical defiance. I couldn't remember a thing. It's highly likely that I was not in fact responsible for what happened. But what other explaination is there. Out of the pool of statistical defiance and into the pool of cliche, I had literally been holding a smoking gun. Speaking of guns, I should have lifted the sawed-off'd 12 guage off that corpse. He won't be needing it, and I have a strange feeling it would come in handy where I'm going, the destination void to me.

Inventory

2006-03-23T17:40:00.000-05:00

I was bored, so I decided to do an inventory on my games. I realized in doing this how many great titles I've got rid of, and will need to replace. Anyway, here is the list, seperated by platform.

(note: not included are games for dated systems (i.e. PSX, SNES, N64, etc...) and games that I've let people borrow. These are merely the games I actually have in my possession right now, so theres quite a few missing. Which sucks.)

Playstation 2 -

-Sly 2: Band of Theives
-Resident Evil 4: Special Edition
-Driver: Parallel Lines: Special Edition
-Hot Shots Golf: Fore
-Grand Theft Auto 3
-Grand Theft Auto: Vice City
-Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas
-Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas: Second Edition
-Red Dead Revolver
-Playboy: The Mansion
-Jak and Daxter: The Precursor Legacy
-Midnight Club 3: Dub Edition
-God of War
-Klonoa 2: Lunatea's Veil
-Dragon Quest 8

GameCube -

-Fire Emblem: Path of Radiance
-Lego StarWars
-Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life
-Metroid Prime
-Metroid Prime 2: Echoes
-Super Smash Brothers Melee
-World Series of Poker
-Mario Kart: Double Dash
-Super Monkey Ball

Nintendo DS -

-Castlevania: Dawn of Sorrow
-Nintendogs: Chihuahua & Friends
-Nintendogs: Lab & Friends
-Super Mario 64 DS
-Super Princess Peach
-WarioWare: Touched

GameBoy Advanced -
Final Fantasy Tactics: Advanced
Legend of Zelda: Minish Cap

Buckethead @ Ziggy's - Winston-Salem

2006-03-20T15:15:00.000-05:00

Saint Patricks day we went to the Buckethead show at Ziggy's. A friend of mine came from out of town. We met up with some other friends around 10 and went to Ziggy's. Unfortunately we were late in arriving and missed the opening act, a one man show simply called "That One Guy". I spoke to some random drunk guy in the private bar and he said it was rad.

All in all we had a good time. We ended up leaving early because Jenni's back was hurting. Mike and I were ready to jet anyway, so it was ok. I don't think John and Bree were ready to go, which sucked. We all went together, so I'm sure it sucked for them to have to leave early. Buckethead was shedualed for a 2 hour set, but apparently went on for 3. I really wish we could have stayed for the duration.

The show was amazing. The club was packed wall to wall, and was sold out by the time we got there. If you've never seen Buckethead, his stage personna looks like Michael Myers (from Halloween, not SNL) with long hair, and a KFC bucket on his head. The mystique that surrounds this guy is, I'm sure, a lot of the attraction to fans. Officially his name is Brian Carroll, but noone really knows who the fuck he is. I've heard theories of his true identity for years. A friend of mine is dead set on the idea that he is Steve Vai. I've had a theory that Buckethead is actually 2 or 3 different guys, which is highly unlikely, as there's not but a handfull of people on the planet that can perform the audio gymnastics this dude does. Everything about this guy is underscored by his ability on guitar. The virtuoso has played with the likes of Bootsy Collins, Les Claypool, and even the new, not-so Guns N Roses.

I took a few pictures of the show with my new LG phone, but they came out retarded. I'll still post them, of course, but all you can see is lights and sillouettes of figures in the audience. They look pretty cool, but you cant see anything on stage. They do, however, illustrate the mood of the show, which was fantastic.

We ended up staying near the upper-level private bar most of the show. I've been to Ziggy's for several shows, including Gwar and Dillinger Escape Plan, but never have I been to a show that was this packed.

The pictures will be uploaded to my Flickr as soon as possible. As stated before, dont expect to see anything but colored lights.

Yay Nintendo DS

2006-03-08T05:45:00.000-05:00

I got a DS. It is the best thing ever. These are the games I got.

-Super Mario 64 DS; Pretty cool game. I was upset to learn that it's not an exact port of the original Mario 64. You begin this one playing as Yoshi, and you unlock other characters to help you on your quest. The controls are a bit tricky as a lot of the platforming can be quite complicated, and the controls arnt as tight as I'd like, but it's still a really cool game.

-Super Princess Peach; Really cool game so far. It's a side-scroller most comparable to Super Mario 2. In this game, Peach is the hero in this interesting game. Using your magic umbrella, and four selectable "moods" you make your way through the classic style platforming environments. This is a game that really makes the DS worth while for me. I miss the good ol' days when a games merit was guaged on playability and enjoyment rather than how badass the graphics are. Fuck photo-realism. It doesn't impress me.

-Castlevania: Dawn of Sorrow; This is the best game ever. What really drew me to this game was the fact that they use pretty much the exact same engine as Castlevania: Symphony of the Night (psx), which is one of my all time favorite games. As you might expect, the role playing element remains intact as you explore your way through an enormous gauntlet of rooms, hallways, and hidden passageways, all the while building up your characters over-all power and aquiring new powers and means to destroy anything that stands in your way.

- -In Conclusion - -
I havn't finished any of these games. I've put the most time in Castlevania as some of you may have guessed, but the other two are definately worth a purchase if you own a DS. Great games.

Ink

2006-02-25T15:18:00.000-05:00

BLACKHOLE, SON!

2006-02-16T00:54:00.000-05:00

I read an interesting article today in Popular Mechanics as I was waiting to be called in to see the doctor, earlier tonight. A group of scientists that live...somewhere on the planet earth, have been experimenting with new implimentations to increase a robots mobility by creating a kind of muscle structure out of rubber-ish fibers. Normal robots apparently are made mobile through a different kind of material which uses a flood of ions to make a "muscle" move. In the scheme of things, as I was lead to believe, this method is fairly slow, and limits the applications for such a machine. A scientist at Yale, or some such glorified school has come up with a new method to charge the body, which is by using light. I found this interesting because I have absolutely no scientific background, and this kind of shit just baffles me.

When I was a wee lad, I used to dream of being a scientist. I remember that I'd watch The Real Ghostbusters, a popular cartoon when I was small, and I'd want to be Egon so bad. Because he was a genius. MacGuyver was also my hero, and Data from The Goonies. I've always been interested in science, and am reluctant for having never persue that path. I chose a path more along the lines of village idiot, but no regrets here.

I caught a very cool episode of Cosmic Odyssey lastnight on the Science Channel. It began talking about the varied studies in the field of astronomy, discussing the difference between optical, infra-red, radio, x-ray, and gamma studies, and what they implied. I had no idea how easy the break down was for the different bandwidths of energy. These energy bands seem to account for the way pretty much all things are, or are not perceived.

It explained the bands like so: |||||||||| only in color, so it made more sense. Bars three through seven represent the visual spectrum, which are from left to right; violet, indigo, blue, green, yellow, orange, and red. The two bars to the right of bar seven are from left to right; infra-red and radio. The two bars to the left of bar three are from right to left; ultraviolet and x-ray. All these bands differ most definably by their broad, or narrowness in respect to eachother. Which is why they were even discovered to begin with. This is the interesting part.

The guy who first figured out that there was more to the spectrum than the ROYGBIV scale, was just sitting around one day, being lazy, when all the sudden he got the bright idea to take the temperature of each individual band in the visual spectrum. Knowing that a prism would seperate a beam of sunlight into seven bars, he did so and placed a thermometer in each beam and recorded that each beam shared the exact same temperature. The odd thing was, to the right of the red band, he noticed that the temperature was slightly warmer. There was some unseen band of energy that neither he, nor anyone else in recorded history had ever noticed before. A band of energy that seemed even more red than red. This band is called Infra-Red. Neat eh? That's not all, he also found that ultraviolet light was on the opposite end of the spectrum by a differing temperature. I mean, why try just one side. So in discovering the sandwhich of invisible energy this man unlocked a whole new way of looking at the universe. That which is impossible to see with the naked eye was now made visible by focusing on a different kind of energy. It has opened up a whole new territory in astronomy.

Infra-red and ultraviolet bands are not where it stopped. Obviously you know that radio telescopes exist, and these things look at the sky through eyes that see only radio waves, which of course is how we secretly found and eventually allied with aliens over 5 decades ago...but thats another story.

X-ray energy is rad because it has pretty much shut all doors on any argument that blackholes don't exist. X-ray telescopes can pretty much see them directly. There are three different classes of blackholes out there, varying in size and mass. Theres one in our own galaxy that is only about 20 miles in diameter, but with a mass several times greater than the sun. The creation of these black holes are still pretty much theory I suppose. But the educated guessers say that a binary star system where one star is a red giant, and the other is a white dwarf could cause some serious tearage in the space/time continuum. Basically the white dwarf would be bombarded with hydrogen by its neighbor as the larger, dying star rotated around it. The constant assault is countered by the white dwarf shooting energy back at the red giant. Eventually the circumstances are in place for all hell to break loose and the white dwarf kind of implodes on itself. Now, the red giant is still rotating around this kind of, anti-object of incredible mass, and all its properties are pulled into a spiraling orbit around the fresh hole in the universe. Every rotation becomes tighter as the particles get closer and closer to the center. With every rotation the particles move faster and faster, approaching the speed of light. The really weird and cool part is, as they get to the absolute center, theyre moving extremely fast and eventually the particles just disappear. I mean, they dont go anyhere, theyre just gone. In the words of Dr Brown, "erased from existence". Now this changes all the rules, doesnt it? Matter can neither be created nor destroyed. That which is, always has been, and always will be in one form or another. Thats what we "know". Well, it seems the world is not flat anymore, and it blows my fucking mind.

In WWII, special satellites that could detect gamma burts were orbiting our planet to help the various military forces know when a nuclear blast had occured. They eventually began noticing seemingly random gamma bursts from the complete opposite direction than those manning the scopes had intended to monitor. There was some serious shit going on in space. Currently, scientists are trying to understand what these bursts are. They have found that these colossal explosions are taking place outside of our galaxy, which pretty much means they are so far away that the force of the explosion would have to be something so powerful that it defies all things we know about shit that blows up. In order for the bursts to be detected from as far away as we are from them, they would have to be the most destructive blasts to occur in the universe since the big bang itself. A supernova is a mere pussy fart compared to these things.

I wish I could just put the episode of this show on here for you all to see because I'm pretty sure I'm fucking up a lot of this information, and it's so interesting.

Anyway, I'm sure this post is way too long, and way too boring to warrant any real attention, I just wanted to share some of this with you.

Happy Valentines Day

2006-02-14T22:42:00.000-05:00

I dont have any rad heart graphics or anything, but if I did, they'd go right here.

As some of you know, I think of myself as kind of an uneducated, self-proclaimed doctor of history. I thought now an appropriate time to discuss the history of Valentines day.

About 47 years ago, when magic and wonder still ruled the universe, there lived a god named Mercury. He was Italian. He was known for his ability to fly really fast, and for his horrible genetic deformation. Mercury wasn't born in Italy, you see. He was born in the Ukraine, about 6 miles from Chernobyl. When he was born, his parents noticed that he had wings growing out of his ankles, and thus was born Fed Ex. Anyway, Mercury was at the beach one day, and a giant sea-shell crept from the froth of the crashing waves. Mercury, naturally, ran away. He may have even pooped a little, but its undocumented, so I cant say for sure. As he sped away, he heard a voice come from the sea. He turned around, and there was a gorgeous woman sitting in the now open shell. She was naked, and Mercury was now interested in sticking around. (fun fact: The Birth of Venus was painted from the perspective of Mercury, honest!) She introduced herself as Venus, and they commenced with the love making. The soothing sounds of Barry White ensued, and exactly twelve minutes and thirty seconds later, Cupid was born. Cupid was the only god ever born who was introduced to the world with a laser-light show and a White Rabbit overlay. He was sprung fully grown, the first thing he did was go grab a few women. One he carried near his mother as if to brag, the other he ordered to cover his mother with a big blanket, seeing your own mother naked is nasty. Just look at the painting if any of this is sounding...er...inaccurate. Paintings older than America dont lie!

And now the history of Valentines Day:

Cupid was the cousin of Icarus. The two were in constant competition. As they grew up, Icarus fell into the category of "bad-boy" while Cupid leaned more toward "sissy-boy". Though mocked by other gods, Cupid was adored by the ladies. He was their trusted friend. A male who could really understand the way they thought. Clearly he was trolling, we know that now, which is why he has his own holiday. But at the time, he had a hard time making friends with members of the same sex, even at his height on the social/celestial ladder. The really great thing is, he didnt fucking care. I mean think about it. Cupid was a genius. He found a way to mingle with all the really hot goddesses without triggering their innate lesbian, man-hating tendancies that all goddesses (and women) seem to share. This angered Icarus. You see, for the longest time, Icarus had thought of himself as a ladies man. He fell in with a bad crowd in his younger days, and established his "bad boy" reputation early on. Showing off any chance he could, and adding new feats of courage and skill to his avionic repertoire daily. Long story short, Icarus saw Cupid's success with the ladies, and it pissed him off. Icarus decided to challenge his cousin to a duel of skills. He knew, though, that Cupid had no chance what-so-ever of winning at a contest of flying. The only way to truely win the respect and admiration of the goddesses was to beat him at a contest where Cupid's prowess was well known.

The now famous Tourne de Archery took place many many years before the invention of water. I dont recall the exact date. It was in the 80s or something. The important part is, Cupid and Icarus matched skills with a bow on the sacred ground of Olympus Mons, or as you may know it, Mount Olympus. The great mountain where Zeus set the capitol of his empire. Eventually, of course, Zeus moved Olympus Mons to Mars to get away from his retarded grandchildren. Look it up if you dont believe me. Olympus Mons is now on Mars. (fun fact: Mars is the Greek name for Cupid's father, Mercury) Its like 4 times the size of Mount Everest. It's Insane. Anyway, long story short, Icarus got his ass handed to him. He was no match for Cupid in a contest of archery. In a last ditch effort to save not only his name, but any possible future with some bitches, Icarus challenged his cousin to one final match. Who could fly the highest. Flying high was a big deal in the 60s, which is when all this took place, I'm pretty sure. I know I said it was the 80s, but then I remembered at the beginning of this bullshit story I said this happened around 47 years ago, so we'll go with the 60s. So anyway, the idea was to get really really high. Cupid, having some badass wings and mother-fucking Mercury as his father, figured he had a good shot at beating Icarus at this contest. Defeating Icarus would surely send him into a depression the likes of which he'd never recover, leaving Cupid to have his way with all the women, with no competition from his cousin. Cupid accepted.

This was not a race, mind you, but never-the-less both parties began flying as fast as they could toward the heavens. Higher and higher they climbed, clouds parting and swirling like smoke in their wake. Eventually Cupid began to tire. His wings became heavy and he decided to turn back, and allow Icarus this victory. Losing this match would certainly ensure sympathetic ladies upon his landing, and Icarus could have his pride back. It was a win win situation. So Cupid descended toward the Earth, conjuring a few tears to ensure atleast a few consoling breast laden peers below. As he touched ground, he looked to the sky only to notice his cousin still racing toward the Sun. Icarus, so blind by his own jealousy and pride was intent on not only beating Cupid's height, but breaking the record for highest flight, which was incidentally held by Mercury, Cupid's old man. Blah blah blah, yadda yadda yadda, Icarus slammed into the sun, and Cupid, feeling so guilty for driving his cousin into this unbalanced state of mind, turned to a life of crime. It started simple. Selling a little dope here, organizing cat juggeling meets there, it wasn't pretty. Eventually Cupid's mental state completely imploded and he began crafting cursed arrows that would turn man against man. Lust driven rage would engulf the world as brother was pit against brother for the hand of a woman. Love would be a plague that would eventually destroy the world. He started simple. He needed to test his theory. Could this idea of Love truely be used as a weapon. In order to test his plan, he picked the most promising musical group he had seen at the time. Could he destroy all the hard work and collaboration of some of the greatest musical minds of that generation simply with the introduction of a female and a little slab of love? And as a kind of signiture, to show the world that it was his doing and not fate, Cupid matched one of the most desired men at the time with the most god-awful looking women he had ever seen. Cupid introduced John Lennon to Yoko Ono, and his assumptions were made reality. The Beetles fell apart like moist tofu in the mouth of a lion. Cupid's plan crushed the musical group as if under the weight of a...well, a beetle. The large wooden hammer of vengence would be visited on everyone, he promised himself. And he's been at it ever since. The only way to calm the fury of Cupid is to once a year ingest large quantities of bad chocolate and bad greeting card poetry. And so Valentines day was born, to stave off the wrath of the most feared god of the Roman pantheon, Cupid.

The moral of the story? Dont do drugs, ever, esspecially while updating your blog.

Younger Days

2006-02-07T18:39:00.000-05:00

And Life Continues

2006-02-05T23:24:00.000-05:00

It has been quite some time since my last entry, and for those of you who care, I apologize. Work has been crazy the past few weeks, which has contributed to my neglect. Last thursday I helped to launch a new store in Mocksville. It was an honor to help, and at the same time the worst experience I've had with my current employer. It would be very unprofessional to go into detail, I just hope I'm never asked to work there again.

I've decided I'd like to train my dog for agility races as soon as I possibly can. I'm certain that she has not only the physical ability, but the intellect to handle such a task. There's no way of knowing if she'll ever compete, or if the training itself will ever take place, but it is a good dream. I think she'd enjoy having an agility course in her future. If only we had a big yard.

A friend of mine has recently started on the construction of a new site for a friend of his. He was stressing pretty hard about some of the problems he was having with its structure, but I'm sure he's remedied anything that was hindering its growth. I'd like to see him get into web design professionally. I think it would make him a lot happier, and it's something he'd be great at.

The business Adam and I had is pretty much at an end. His inability to meet his own set dates is the cause of the failure. The premise was simple. Clients with a damaged gaming console would bring their machines to a local comic book store and drop them off, along with the payment, and a promise of two weeks. My function was to pick up and transport the systems to and from the shop, along with customer service. His was to basically refurbish the systems. I spoke several times with the third party in our venture and eased his worry about Adam's apparent lack of responsibility a number of times, but I suppose it wasn't enough. I spoke to the third party earlier today, and his patience is shot. I don't blame him. It's too bad this didn't work out. The market for this service is more than abundant. There could have been a lot of extra money for all three of us. It only takes one weak link. I'd like to make it clear through this fog of blame implication that Adam is infact a good guy. He's honest from what I know of him, and in another time this whole prospect may have been a success. Unfortunately he is currently going through a time in his life that can be explained in no other way than as a gauntlet. Hopefully when everything works out for him, we can give this another try. If we can't, I hope atleast that he can. I feel that if we can get something rolling along smoothely, I may be able to negotiate either with the current third party, or perhaps another vender. I guess only time will tell.

For Kory:

2006-01-16T16:26:00.000-05:00

Asian Under Fire.

The Lucifer

2006-01-12T01:42:00.000-05:00

I finally decided to shape my beard. Until I learn the real name of the style, I'm calling it the Lucifer. I've still got some shaping to do, but I'm not sure if I want to grow my jaw-carpet back to connect it to my sideburns or not. Until I decide, I will just let it grow longer and trim the taper as needed. Before you decide to make fun of it, you should know that I punch really, really hard. I also pull hair, fishhook, gouge eyes, curb-jaw, clothes-line and I'm not above to kicking a man in the balls. I'm old school. Just a heads up.

This picture is horrible, but it gets the basic idea of what it looks like across.

Sniff, Relent, Sniff Again

2006-01-09T17:42:00.000-05:00

Drinking Orange Juice

2006-01-08T23:57:00.000-05:00

I didn't do much today. I slept in pretty late, had the day off. On the way to the store earlier I almost hit a dog. It was slick the way I evaded it. Ended up stopping the car about a foot away from the dog without squeeling the tires. I play a lot of GTA so I'm pretty badass.

Watched a couple movies earlier:
-The Exorcism of Emily Rose
-Four Brothers
-Kingdom of Heaven

Other than that I havn't been doing much. Working a lot. Drawing a little. I was supposed to go see some band play the other night but didn't. I was invited to a party and didn't feel up to going. I don't know what my deal is lately, I just have no drive to go out anymore. I hope it's a phase.

I'm supposed to go get my tattoo pretty soon. I have till April to use the gift certificate I got for Christmas. I still don't know what to get. I know for sure that I want to get my old tattoo touched up. It was done with a single needle and some india ink in Wilmington about 5 years ago at a party, and the work isn't what you'd call professional. I like my tat, it's just fading pretty bad. I think I just want to get it outlined or something.

Booorrinnngggg.

Street Lamp

2006-01-08T23:31:00.000-05:00

Chicago

2006-01-08T05:21:00.000-05:00

Happy New Year

2006-01-01T11:32:00.000-05:00

Merry Christmas

2005-12-25T11:42:00.000-05:00

First of all, Merry Christmas. Yes, I said it. Christmas. Today is Christmas. Oddly enough, Hanukkah actually begins on the same day as Christmas this year, yet, I'm not going with happy Hanukkah. OOOOOOHHHHH.

Moving along, I got woke up by my dog this morning. Apparently she was excited about getting her doggie stocking which was filled with all kinds of things dogs like. Chew toys, bones, rawhide strips. Basically just shit she can chew on.

I don't feel like writing a real lengthy post on this day. Here's some of the things I was gifted.

- A framed Yes album called Tormato on vinal.
- Some clothes.
- Two DVDs: Ninja Destroyer starring people that more than likely existed on screen only in the 80s and Born to Win starring my boy Robby De Niro.
- Some poker chips.
- A new wallet.
- A gift certificate for a tattoo at some place called Earths Edge Tattoo here in Winston.
- Other stuff.
- Etcetera and so-on.

Have a merry Christmas ladies and gentlemen.

-J.M.Janke

The Christmas Spirit

2005-12-21T17:21:00.000-05:00

The past couple days of work have been insane. I can't wait for Christmas to be over. I've had game cases thrown at me more than once in the past couple days. Apparently I'm an asshole. I've found that people that shop in the mornings are 98.7% more psychotic than people that shop in the evenings. That figure is accurate, I used a calculator and everything.

Right now I'm listening to one of my new favorite bands. They are called the Super Furry Animals and they are rad. Some of their stuff reminds me of Ween. Not crazy Ween like anything on Pure Guava. But the real music that Ween does. Anyway these guys are fantastic, and really sound nothing like Ween, they just remind me of them. Fuck you, Ween is great.

Tomorrow I have the day off. I think it will be a great opportunity for me to lay around and do absolutely nothing. I might get up a couple times to pee, but I havn't decided. I supposed I'll just have to cross that bridge when I reach it.

-This Week In Games-
Currently I'm playing:
- Dragon Quest VIII
- God of War
- Resident Evil 4
- Grand Theft Auto - San Andreas - Second Edition
- World Series of Poker

God of War I've of course already finished a while ago. Decided to warm the beast back up and get to work killing pretty much everything I see.

Dragon Quest is badass so far. It plays like an RPG you might expect from Square Enix, and is gorgeous graphically. The music is also great.

Resident Evil 4 is a game I like to take my time with. I don't play it everyday, and am having a great time just kind of slowly trudging through it. Very fun game.

San Andreas 2nd Edition is pretty much exactly the same as the original, except some very specific lines of code were removed. It comes with a bonus DVD with a couple movies on it. The graphics seem to be a little better, but that could just be manifested purely in my head. I'd like to say they've added a few things, but the things I'm noticing could just be shit I missed in my first run-through of the original. I should probably look into it, but I really don't care. It's fun regardless.

World Series of Poker is retarded. I bought it so my girlfriend could have something to play. It's really addictive, and entertaining if you're into poker. You can make custom characters, which makes absolutely no sense to me, but whatever. The only complaint I really have is that it takes so long to get through a tournament, and you have to place pretty high in order to win anything. If you lose, you can't play that tournament again. I've not even come close to placing. It's hard as balls, and takes so long.

Anyway, If I don't update again before the holiday, I'd like to wish everyone a Merry Whatever. Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwanzaa, and/or whatever else I'm missing. Bottom line, keep it real, and try not to get drunk and drive your car into a child. You can make that your Christmas present to me. No drunken killing of children. Thats all I want.

-J.M.Janke

Manager On Duty

2005-12-18T07:15:00.000-05:00

As most of my friends know, today is going to be the first day of my new position at work. I've been promoted to something called a Senior Game Advisor, which is also called "Third-Key". I'm a manager now. Today I have to open the store, and I'm pretty nervous. I've been training the past couple weeks and working a lot of hours to do so, which should explain my recent blog neglect. That, and I really have nothing worth writing about. Anyway, wish me luck.

-J.Janke

Prince of Persia: Two Thrones - Full Game Review

2005-12-03T02:07:00.000-05:00

Wow.

-J.Janke

Straight from the case:

One Warrior. Two Souls.

I returned home expecting peace. Instead I found my kingdom ravaged by war and my people enslaved. Now I am a fugitive, hunted by hostile armies and plagued by a curse that is gradually possessing my soul. A darker prince resides in me now, and I must embrace his powers and skill if I want to restore peace to my land, my people, and my soul.

-Craft your killing style with stealthy Speed Kills and creative Free-Form Fighting.
-Seize the reins of a chariot and battle through the open-ended city of Babylon.
-Embrace your cursed soul and unleash the deadly Daggertail as the Dark Prince.

Specifics:

[ 1 Player ] [ Memory Card (for PS2) - 175 KB ] [ Analog Control ]
[ Vibration Function ] [Progressive Scan ]
Developed and Published by Ubisoft
DVDROM Format
Rated M by ESRB

Prince of Persia
Ubisoft

Yay PSP

2005-11-04T19:20:00.000-05:00

With an upcoming trip to Colorado, I figured I better go ahead and get myself a new toy to have on the trip. That's right bitches, I got a PSP. Of course, the trip isnt the only reason I went ahead and got one. I've been wanting one for a while now, and just decided to go ahead and drop some cash on one today. I also picked up Grand Theft Auto: Liberty City Stories. I'm a big GTA fan.

Sadly, I've not been able to actually play it yet. There's a software update that you need in order to play it. The UMD comes with the software, but in order to update, I have to charge my battery completely. I assumed the battery would register as 100% when plugged in, but I was mistaken. So now I wait.

I was having trouble figuring out how to put music on my psp, but a buddy of mine helped me out. He sent me to a site that held content which would remedy my problem. After reading the simple directions, I was off and ready to transfer all kinds of shit. I only have a 32MB memory stick for the PSP right now, so I can't really go buckwild on the transfers. Next week I'll probably pick up a 512MB stick so I can put a few pictures and some tracks on this bad boy. I'm so excited about having this thing. It's really awesome.

This is by far the most expensive pooping companion I've ever purchased.

-J.Janke

Halloween Is Dead

2005-11-02T23:39:00.000-05:00

So my Halloween was bullshit. First of all, I had to work. It wouldn't have been so bad, but Lucas Films gave our company exclusive rights to release StarWars: Battlefront II early. But we weren't allowed to start selling it till after the store would normally close. So the whole night we had probably 3 customers. It was so dead. There was absolutely nothing to do. Nothing to clean, nothing to straighten. Nothing. 9 o'clock rolls around and we get attacked by a bunch of dorks who just had to have the game 10 hours early. We didn't end up getting out of there till about 10pm.

On the way home I noticed something a little eerie. I didn't see one goddamn pirate. No ninjas. No vampires. There wasn't one trick-or-treater out. Highly disappointing. When I got home I was told that there wasn't a single knock at our door. No children roming the streets. This upsets me.

Halloween is a great holiday. Not only do you get to dress up like a big douche, but people actually give you CANDY for it. What the fuck is going on. How could there not be one kid out walking around with a pillow case and a plastic mask looking for fun size Snickers? I blame republicans, personally.

Okay, cleary this update is crap. I didn't get to do anything for halloween. But if you'd like to read an exciting Halloween story, swing on over to Awethum, my friend's blog.

That's about it. I know these entries are getting few and far between. The content is becoming a lot less interesting. I believe I'm losing my drive to keep this thing going. Not that it matters, I think three people on the planet read this shit, and I know them all personally. I'll try to get my shit together, I've just been really busy.

Anyway, hope everyone had a great holiday. Take care and be safe.

-J.Janke

-update-
I neglected to mention that I'm currently playing Resident Evil 4 (ps2 version) and Genji: Dawn of the Samurai and will more than likely drop a few words about both in the weeks to come. I don't know if I'll be doing a full game review, but I'll totally think about it. Hard.

Minor Update

2005-10-18T14:11:00.000-04:00

I havn't really been wanting to update my blog lately. I figured I should go ahead and just get it out of the way today, and recap whats been going on the past few days.

On Friday around 6pm, Jenni and I left for Richlands to visit some friends. When we got there, we just kind of sat around. Matt and I talked about shirts briefly. Honestly I'm having trouble remembering what I did all weekend. This is hard.

Latenight Friday/ early morning Saturday, I went with JG to his house to play some videogames on his emulator. I played Ducktails for a while. You probably need to be made aware that Ducktails is one of my favorite and most memorable games from NES. JWhite arrived while I was playing the moon level. We talked for a while, then started playing Mike Tysons Punch-Out. Another classic.

JG disappeared upstairs, we could only assume that he went up there to sleep. JWhite and I retired to the living room to flip through some channels and see if anything worth falling asleep to was on. There wasn't. Sadly, we found a movie called Ali G: In Da House, which kept us up for another couple hours. We laughed our asses off. Tears rolled from our eyes, and our bellies ached. Eventually JWhite fell asleep on the couch, and I made my way to the guest room to follow his example.

Saturday I got woke up by Matt and Jenni. Jenni was mad because she didn't recall me telling her I was going to JG's. She was half asleep at the time. We argued for a couple minutes, but it passed. It was a really stupid argument:

Me - I told you I was leaving.
Her - No you didn't.
Me - Yes, I did.
Her - No you didn't.
Me - Yes. I did.
Her - No, you didn't.

Like I said, really stupid argument. Anyway, after a few minutes we let it go and got on with our day, which was pretty much void of activity. That night we had a barbecue over at JG's house. I made some burgers, Matt made some burgers. There were hotdogs. I can't really remember any important details about this event. One thing inparticular though. JG is kind of a control freak, so I made like I was going put my burgers on early. He actually grabbed my wrist and said not to. I was only kidding when I went into it, but after that I put them on the grill just to piss him off. He is, after all, the "best gamer that has ever lived." I guess you really had to be there.

Let's see, that night we went to Matt's and had a couple drinks. JWhite and JG went to see MG's band play. MG is JG's little brother, and apparently his band rocks. Afterward they went to some keg party. So I didn't really get to see them for the remainder of the night. Matt and I watched Unleashed, with Jet Li. Horrible movie. If you get the chance to pick up this movie, get it for cheap, and set it on fire.

Sunday morning we didn't do much. Matt cleaned his car. Jenni got trash out of our car. Alyssa walked around and made random noises, which could loosely be considered words. Alyssa is awesome. She's just a toddler, but she's the coolest person I know. I mean when she has to poop, she just does it in her pants. How cool is that? I'd give anything to be able to poop in public and have it be okay. Okay, maybe not, but it's still kind of rad.

We ended up leaving around 1:00pm and didn't get to see JG or JWhite again, but all in all it was a pretty good weekend. The only bad point was the fact that I had to get home before 6 so I could go to work and do inventory till 1:00am. Doing inventory is shitty.

That about brings us up to date. I have to go to work in a few hours, so I'm going to down as much coffee as I possibly can. I will smoke entirely too many cigarettes, and probably talk to JWhite on Gtalk till I have to start getting ready. Okay thats all. You may leave now.

-J.Janke

The Weekend

2005-10-11T14:11:00.000-04:00

Well, I worked all weekend again. It wasn't too bad though, it'll all pay off on the paycheck.

Friday after work, I drove to Bree and John's to meet Jenni. It was Bree's birthday, and they were all pretty wasted by the time I got there. We listened to some music, chased butterflies, it was crazy.

Saturday I slept in way too late recovering from the night previous. Then work called and asked if I could come in a little early. This upset me, but I agreed and set off to work. It was a very miserable night.

On Sunday after work, a few of us went to my house to hang out for a few minutes. We needed to wait on Beast to go home and change. When Beast arrived at my house, Chris and he started playing with their PSP's. Chris was offended when I said "stop playing Nintendo"....he replied, "ITS NOT NINTENDO, ITS A PSP." I hope he was kidding. We all hope he was kidding. Moving along, We went to a resteraunt called Copelands and ate dinner. Chris has a second job there, so we got to eat for really cheap, and he paid, which was super.

That about recaps the weekend from my end. I'm sure I missed a few points, and left a few points out intentionally. Regardless, that preceding was the jist.

-J.Janke

Adventures in Keyboards

2005-10-07T15:02:00.000-04:00

Photobucket is Broken

2005-10-06T03:19:00.000-04:00

Apparently Photobucket's servers are down. My welcome picture isn't loading, and is being replaced with "Image Hosted by Photobucket", which is annoying me slightly. Hopefully they'll work their problems out fairly soon. If not, I'm going to find a new image hosting site. This is clearly USDA choice, Grade A, 100% vorpal bullshit. It's been doing this crap since this morning. I know it seems like a minor problem, but as you well know I'm a professional ninja, and I'd hate for some random passer-by to feel my wrath due to my frustration, and my blatant unwillingness to cope with said problem in a calm and orderly fashion.

Anyway, I just wanted to mention it so anyone that is new to visiting this site understands that it's not my fault, and that I am infact the Alpha and the Omega. I'll give them 2 days, and if the problem isn't fixed, I'm going to set something on fire... with lasers from my eyes.

-J.Janke

Fo Twenny

2005-10-05T14:40:00.000-04:00

My unique visitor counter just hit 420. Thought it was worth mentioning.

-J.Janke

Indigo Prophecy (ps2)

2005-10-04T16:08:00.000-04:00

This game is pretty weird. I can honestly say that some people will really hate this game. I personally love it. If you're into action packed gameplay, upgrading your character with cool new weapons, and killing everything you see, this isn't the game for you.

Indigo Prophecy brings an intriguing new story to the world of gaming. Rather than mastering the many maneuvers of your unstoppable hero, you will be made to explore your environments, find clues, and use real time reflexes to get through the game. I don't want to spoil the game for anyone who hasn't played, but the games innovative approach to control is nothing short of spectacular. When your character is fighting to hang on to a low flying helecopter, you actually get tired. When you're lifting weights to warm up for a friendly sparring match, your arms will ache. When you're playing a game of One on One with a co-worker to settle a bet, you will need to be quick. No button mashing here, ladies and gentlemen. The majority of your actions will be made with the analog sticks.

There is much more to this game than neat character controls. The camera controls, though a bit difficult to get used to, seem to play well against the mood of the game. Rather than the basic one-point/third person camera with 360 degree rotation, you'll be given control of a cinematic style camera for the majority of your exploration. In some areas you can use a 360 camera to rotate around your character, and at the same time move the camera completely off the token character to explore the realm with a camera that you're more than likely not used to seeing in games. In some areas, you'll be stripped of your character camera and it will be replaced with camera points set through out the environment, usually in rooms in various buildings. It kind of reminds me of the Resident Evil style cameras, only instead of the cameras being location activated...that is to say, you have to move to a point in the room to get a new camera angle, as you do in Resident Evil...you can change the camera angles on your own. So if you enter a room and theres an eerie camera angle pointed at the top of your head, you can get a good idea of your surrounding environment by mashing the R1 button, this will switch the view to various camera points through out the area of the room in which you're standing. This may sound complicated, because I'm not that great of a writer, but it's made simple in actual gameplay.

Perhaps the biggest point of this game is the way the story pans out. While the game is somewhat linear, in that you will go where it wants you to go, the events play out depending on the decisions you make in any given situation. Making this game both very linear, yet, very open-ended. It's really something you'll have to see to understand, unless I'm getting the point across, which I don't think I am. For example, in the beginning of the game, the anti-hero murders a man in a bathroom stall. Now after this happens, you can handle the situation as you see fit. You can run out without cleaning up the crime scene at all, or you can clean up the mess. You can leave the body lying on the floor, or move it somewhere else. You can opt to calmly walk out, pay your tab, and leave, or you can run out frantically, neglect your tab, and cause a scene. No matter what you do, it's going to impact what happens later in the game. Who will notice you, who will remember you, what clues you leave behind, all these factors play in the outcome of the situation.

Another intriguing point of the game is that there is no real main character. You'll control not only the suspect in the crime, but the detectives responsible for solving the case. Each character you control has an integral place in the story, and with every section of game that you complete, another piece of the puzzle is revealed.

Now I've gone on and on about why this game is great. Sadly I do have a few complaints.

The object interaction in this game can be a bit touchy. You'll often find yourself having to walk over the same area of an environment three or four times just to get the interaction option to pop up long enough to select the action. This rarely causes any problems in moments of distress, but can become frusturating if you're not patient. Another minor complaint comes from some of the action sequences. I mentioned before how you'll have to use real time reflexes to get yourself out of some touchy situations. To do this you are given a prompt on the screen in the shape of two circles, each with for directions. The directions light up and you have to match them accordingly with the analog sticks in order to make it out of the troubled area. This is all fine and good, it's challenging in a fun way, but when you're paying attention to what you need to press and when, you miss a lot of the on screen action because you have to focus so intently on what controls to manipulate. This could be remedied with a cinema replay option, where you could act the scene out at one point, then watch the scene replay afterwards.

The bottom line is this game is fantastic. It makes use of many original ideas and presents a play style where causality is at the forefront of game progression. Touchy situations are stimulating mentally and physically through environmental design, ambient noise, a great (often subtle) soundtrack, and a general mood that really puts you into the story. The graphics while at first glance seem a little underpar, are actually perfect for the story, and any awkward designs are made up for by very human facial features, gestures, and responses. The game is comparable to games like Phantasmagoria, Resident Evil, and the like, but is in no way part of the horror genre. It seems to make its own declarations in the gaming world. Declarations that will be followed, mimiced, and improved upon in years to come. Or atleast I hope so.

-J.Janke

Specifics:
-1 Player - Analog Control - Vibration Function - Pressure Sensitive
-DVDROM Format
-Game available for PS2 and XBOX - Rated M - QuanticDream/Atari

-Straight From The Case-
Possessed by unexplainable urges, decent citizens are murdering others throuhout the city. At random. In public. Control an ever-changing plot in this groundbreaking supernatural thriller that twists tighter with every move you make. Outsmart the cops. Uncover the truth behind your unspeakable crime. Battle dark forces as you roam the city and fall deeper into the mystery. Every choice, every action shifts and alters your journey -- you might pay dearly for your crime. Or edge closer to the unbelievable secret of the prophecy.

THE KILLER IS YOU.

-Bend, twist and change the wide-open gameplay with each action and decision
-Control the characters' sanity and mental stability
-Unravel the dark motives through four playable characters
-Experience suspenseful, cinematic split-screen action

Featuring music from Theory of a Deadman

Indigo Prophecy
Atari

O Rly? Ya Rly.

2005-10-02T01:18:00.000-04:00

Today blew.

When I got up Jenni was having a really bad migraine, so she had to go to the hospital. I had to go to work so her mom had to take her. She was there a while but they ended up releasing her rather than keeping her over night. So that's good.

Work was bullshit. Some rednecks came in looking for movies and would not shut up. They were loud-talking and laughing like idiots for the duration of their visit. It took every ounce of will power I could summon to keep from setting the lot of them on fire. They also made a giant mess of the displays, which was nice. I have to work tomorrow all day. Hopefully we'll get fewer jagoffs in, but I'm not getting my hopes up. Unfortunately we have a store meeting after we close, and I'm sure that will be a whole new string of crap to deal with. Esspecially since some douche just got fired for stealing.

I returned Tekken 4 because it was stupid. I picked up Dark Cloud instead. I want to get Tekken Tag because it has bowling, but its a CD format game and my ps2 hates them. I'm thinking about buying a ps2 slim line but I havn't decided. The fans in those models are faulty, and they tend to overheat.

I came home around 7 to check on Jenni. She was still in a lot of pain but was doing better. She's been sleeping since I got home, so I guess that's good. I'm hoping she'll start feeling better tomorrow.

Other than the above mentioned not much is going on. Duchess is giving me the "I have to take a shit" look, so I'm going to go ahead and end this post. Take it easy everyone.

-J.Janke

Shattered Dreams

2005-09-30T13:24:00.000-04:00

Well yesterday I was supposed to have the day off. Apparently a little drama took place involving some theft and someone got fired, so LJ called me and asked if I'd come in to help him close the store. So anyway I went in for a few hours to help with customers and straightening up. We didnt end up getting out till like 10:30 or so, which really sucked cause I'm getting a cold. It doesn't really matter though, I have to work all weekend regardless.

I picked up my copy of Indigo Prophecy lastnight. When I got home, I popped it in and wasn't shocked to find that it was a very interesting game. The controls are like none I've ever seen, and the game itself is more like an interactive movie than a video game. Needless-to-say, its pretty neat. I've only put in a couple hours, but I can already tell I'm going to love it.

I also picked up Jak and Daxter, Jak 2, and Tekken 4 because we were having a special on used games.

That about wraps up this update. I need to go get some coffee and a pack of smokes for Jenni, then I need to start getting ready for work.

-J.Janke

New Look

2005-09-29T03:16:00.000-04:00

If you've been here before, you probably noticed that a made a few minor changes to the look of the site. It's not much different, but I really like this look a lot better. I've also added a few links, including some links to the sites of a couple friends of mine, my photo gallery, and some sites I like to frequent. I need to go ahead and put the previous post section back up. I kind of miss it being there.

Anyway, any feedback on the topics I cover, questions, or anything you simply want to say can be posted through the comments option at the bottom of each post, or via email which is linked to the right. Thanks for dropping by, and by all means, keep coming back.

-J.Janke

Busy Busy Busy

2005-09-28T23:20:00.000-04:00

The past few days I've been pretty busy what with my work schedual and doing homework. My homework consists of playing videogames though, so really I've been having a great time. Anyway, Here is a list of games I've tested in the past few days. Mind you, these games have all already been realeased because I only take home games from the USED library.

-Vexx (ps2) - Vexx is a 3-D platformer in the tradition of Mario 64, I Ninja, Ratchet 'n Clank, and the like. Unfortunately the games too repetative and way too difficult for litereally zero pay off. Bottom line: Don't buy this game.

-Batman Begins (ps2)- What can I say. This game just completely blew. It really looked like it should have been a great game. The graphics were neat. The voice acting was decent, as the players from the movie (i.e. Liam Neason, Christian Bale, Ken Watanabe, etc) worked on the game as well. Unfortunately the controls are horrible, the camera is unusable, and the cut scenes of actual movie footage that attack you way too often get old really really fast. Bottom line: Buy this game and set it on fire.

-Shadow of Rome (ps2)- Okay, this game took some getting used to, but I found it highly addictive. So addictive infact that instead of returning it to the store, I just went ahead and bought it. The game does have some bad points, sadly. The part of this game that stuck me is the gladiator events that you have to charge through in order to progress through the game. This shit is so fun. You are a Roman general whos mother has been executed, and father is being framed for the murder of Julius Caesar. In order to get revenge on he who has done you wrong, you earn your way into a gladiator stable and participate in the gladiatorial games. Like I said, this portion of the game can be frusturating, but it manages to stay entertaining. The bad part of this game is the second character you have to play as. The second character is the nephew of the late J. Caesar. With this guy you have to sneak around parts of rome and gather information about the plot behind Caesar's murder. This proves not only bland and repetative, but redundant as well. The only pay off is the fact that when you finish a part, you get to start playing as the gladiator again. I'm just about done with this game, but I get a feeling that the replay value is going to be fairly high. Hopefully I'll unlock some sort of arena option so I can just pop in the game and murder other gladiators with newly aquired weapons and armor rather than having to bullshit my way through the stealth portions. Bottom line: A fun game, but I'd definately recommend renting it before you buy it.

-Burnout 3 (ps2)- Really fun game. I guess this game just pretty much boils down to a racer geared toward entertainment rather than simulation. Cause wrecks to gain points and unlock new goodies. Bottom line: Good times, if you like this game, check out the most recent addition, Burnout Revenge. Also very fun.

-Fantastic 4 (ps2)- I didn't really like this game. I don't want to dump all over it though, because I'm sure theres a huge audience for this type of game. Bottom line: My personal opinion is that it blew, but you should try it for yourself.

Okay, there were a few more that I tested recently but I really don't feel like typing anymore. Tomorrow is my day off and I'm going to just go and relax now.

-J.Janke

GUN

2005-09-23T12:00:00.001-04:00

At E3 (the Electronics Entertainment Expo) a lot of great upcoming games were on display, in addition to the new machines developed by Microsoft, Sony and Nintendo. One game inparticular was a mystery title simply called GUN. While most of the other developers had playable demos and a metric shit-load of swag to get the on lookers pumped, the mysterious title GUN had nothing but it's title. Reporters from G4 and the uber influential game magazines probed, poked, prodded (and any other 'p' words that are applicable) for answers, to no avail.

Being the super sleuth/professional ninja/celebrated pornographer that I am, I've found the answers. Those in charge have released some details on this not-yet-released title. First of all, its a western. Hopefully not like Rockstar's epic failure Red Dead Revolver. The sub par graphics of RDR were eclipsed only by it's clunky controls and redundant plot line. The only western themed game I can remember ever really enjoying is the Nintendo arcade classic Wild Gunman which molded the likeness of gunslingers and desertscapes over the Duck Hunt engine. Great game. Needless-to-say, I've all but given up on westerns in video games.

Gun just may be the title to remedy my jaded disposition. The screenshots I've seen look fantastic. According to my secret network of underground dwelling, fire breathing spies, the game itself will be extremely open-ended, that is to say, non linear. Unlike the steaming pile of crap Rockstar unloaded on my chest in Red Dead Revolver. I'm not too fond of Neversoft, but I'm trying not to let that sway my excitement for this game, if for no other reason than the fact that I am a huge Rockstar fan and their western-ish title was an atomic explosion of suck. Ive learned that you can't expect great things 100% of the time from great developers, likewise you can't expect bullshit 100% of the time from shitty developers.

Some of the big names, or should I say, some of the moderately known yet oddly under appreciated names, doing the voice acting for this game have been released in the most recent issue of Game Informer magazine. The roster includes, and is more than likely limited to the following:

Thomas Jane - Played Castle/Punisher in The Punisher, was also in Deep Blue Sea and The Sweetest Thing.

Kris Kristofferson - Blade's older, whiter father figure in Blade and Blade 2.

Ron Pearlman - Hellboy. Though, funny twist of fate, he was also in Blade.

Tom Skerritt - The dad in A River Runs Through It, definately not in Blade.

Lance Henriksen - The sherriff in Powder. I've seen him in other movies too, though I fail to summon any other example at this time.

Brad Dourif - Grima Wormtongue in the Lord of the Rings series, also the stuttering psyche patient in the 70's classic One Flew Over the Cuckoos Nest (starring Jack Nicholson)

I've already put my copy of Gun on reserve, which clearly means you should too. Because I'm rad. If the game's worth a damn, I'll more than likely include a game review at some point. Or not. I do what I want.

Releases from Activision for PS2, GameCube, Xbox and Xbox360 this fall.

-J.Janke

Video Games: Entertainment or Portal to Hell?

2005-09-20T10:58:00.000-04:00

Well, Rockstar Games is in the news again for apparently making another impressionable twat kill some people. This time the blame goes to San Andreas for the murder of three cops. 18 year old Devin Moore was found sleeping in a stolen car at 3am by a couple police officers. He was taken to the Fayette, Ala police station where he managed to unholster one of the officers police issue Glock 23 (.40 cal) and started spilling cartridges as he emptied the clip in the general direction of the officers. According to People magazine, all the cops were shot at point blank range, all in the head. Two officers and the dispatcher were killed. This was the stations entire night crew. Later, Moore was found in a field and arrested.

People Magazine: "Arrested in a field hours later, Moore seemed chillingly philosophical, saying, 'Life is like a video game. Everybody's got to die sometime.'"

Are you fucking kidding me? "Chillingly philosophical"?

So anyway, Moore was a fan of Rockstar's latest GTA title, San Andreas. Though this fact wasn't brought up in court, the victim's family filed a $600 million dollar civil suit as they blame the video game industry as the cause. . . Did I miss something? The person responsible for the killing is going to jail to await execution. I guess that's not enough. See, the way I figure it, if Rockstar Games, or the video game industry is responsible for this horrible twist of fate, then Devin Moore is actually innocent of these crimes. I mean, if Moore wasn't capable of these crimes before playing GTA:San Andreas, and the game some how programmed his impressionable mind to commit this act, clearly it can be reprogrammed. I wonder why, if the victims family feel that Rockstar is responsible for this...why arnt they also filing for appeal on behalf of Devin Moore. The young man is going to die. If they honestly feel that the gaming industry is responsible, then Devin Moore can't really be held accountable for his actions and shouldn't really be rotting on death row. Those who are incapable of making their own decisions, or are so easily swayed, belong in a hospital where they can recieve the rehabilitation they need to get on with their lives. This comes down to a basic understanding of what is real, and what is not. Of course my personal opinion on this should be clear by the title. The man responsible is in jail. Video games are not the cause of theft, murder, or crime in general.

The victims family is clearly hurt. I can empathize. But it seems to me that they are trying to capitalize on this trajedy, which is just plain pathetic. No, I take that back, this isn't your garden variety pathetic, this is something special. Rockstar has been in trouble before. When two kids took a parents gun and started firing into traffic, Rockstar was blamed. More recently, the headlines of the 'Hot Coffee Mod', a mod in san andreas which allows you to watch CJ (the main character) and his girlfriend(s) having sex. Now this.

Dr Orzack, Harvard Medical School professor and expert in computer addiction (according to People magazine) states, "These are not just your ordinary citizens who play a game for a while and suddenly turn violent. The ones who become violent are out-of-control to begin with. Other problems exist." Now I ask you, did we really need a Harvard professor to tell us this?

Moore's court appointed attorney, Jim Standridge argued that his client suffered from post-traumatic stress disorder, caused by severe abuse he had endured as a child, and that this condition caused Moore to go into a dissociative state on the night of the murders and "he defaulted to what was obviously a script in his head". The script being GTA: San Andreas.

This is clearly bullshit. Chris McCool, the attorney who prosecuted Moore seems to agree, calling the claim "hogwash", and pointing out that which should be painfully obvious, "There was no evidence that repetitive playing of a video game can result in programmed behavior that would cause someone to do this. I told the jury, 'He's not crazy; he's just mean"

According to Moore himself, this wasn't just a programmed response. According to him, it was a well thought out plan, stating, "I started freaking out. I started looking at [Strictland's] pistol and planning in my mind how to escape." He grabbed Strickland's gun and shot him twice. James Crump another officer hearing the gunshots ran to the room, Moore put 4 more rounds in him. After this, he stalked his way to the dispatcher's office and killed Leslie Mealer who was also there doing his job.

After all this, the victims families have decided to band together to make legal history. Assuming they win, of course. I personally would have gone another way. There was evidence stating that Moore was abused as a child, which caused Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD from now on), which according to the defense put Moore in the state of mind where he would have to shift to a 'default' mentality, in this case being a game Moore enjoyed playing. So even if the gaming industry is the bullet in this situation, the abuse is the gunpowder, situation itself was the trigger, and I'll be damned if Moore wasn't the gun itself. So with all this in mind, rather than persuing an investigation into the abuse and suing the family that abused him, these people decide to go after the video game industry. Well, I suppose in a way that is kind of smart. I doubt the family of the criminal living in poverty laden Alabama could afford to pay SIX HUNDRED MILLION DOLLARS. I guess that's the going rate on relieving the pain of a lost loved one.

So anyway, the specifics as I know them are as such:

The Mealers and Crumps (family of victims) are going after Sony Computer Entertainment America
(markets the core system, Playstation 2), Take-Two Interactive Softwares, and Walmart (where Moore bought the game). Now I'm all about Walmart getting sued, don't get me wrong, but seriously...what in the fuck does Walmart have to do with this. They SELL the game. They SELL the game that has been clearly marked of its content, and also been rated to limit who it can be sold to. They did EXACTLY what is expected of them. Hell, I'm sure they even checked his ID as he bought the game. I work in a video game store, I check IDs. Maybe on a license in addition to listing the holders age, it could also list any mental problems they have. Oh, I know, maybe Walmart should start doing background checks on anyone that wants to buy an M rated game. That way, if someone is picking up a copy of San Andreas and...say...a shotgun, they can't go right out and start murdering people. Cause see, though they could take the 12 guage home the same day with reletively no problem, they would have to wait 4 buisness days to get their copy of San Andreas. Keeping the world safe for a few more hours.

I think we just have to chalk this up to a horrible mixture of circumstances. When you mix a certain two chemicals together, they explode. This isnt to say that all chemicals when combined will explode.
We can't start dictating to eachother what everyone else can and can't handle. At some point you have to understand that we don't live in a capsule where variables can just be shifted around and taken away just to make the world more safe. If this keeps up, eventually we'll all be just short of immortal and have absolutely nothing to live for. My heart goes out to the victims, and their families and I in no way mean to nullify your pain or anger, but this fight you're picking is wrong. 600 Million dollars isn't going to bring Arnold Strickland, Leslie Mealer, or James Crump back. It is, however, going to cheapen their death more than you can possibly understand. They gave their lives doing their duty as police officers, their chosen profession, idealy. A profession whos professionals are called heroes because they are of the few that choose to fill that position, and choose to risk their lives to protect yours on a daily basis. Though it's very sad, and I'm sure very painful, they died for something more important and far more valuable than 600 million dollars. If the loss of these men is shattering your personal economy and going to make it impossible to survive, then perhaps those you are suing would be happy to help you cope. Your neighbors, your state, and your country will do the same. 600 million dollars isn't going to cripple the industry, nor is it going to stop vendors from selling the industries crop to responsible individuals. It is however going to potentially make you very very rich, and I think that's probably the bottom line.

I tell you what, stop trying to decide for the rest of us what we can and can't listen to, play with, or watch on TV. Ratings are put in place to keep impressionable children away from the influence of that which could have a negative effect. The fact that millions and millions of people choose to play such games with no real world consequences should be proof enough that not everyone agrees with you. Not to rip off the movie "The People vs Larry Flint", but eventually we're going to strip away everything that makes this nation what it is. Soon it could be the freedoms you enjoy that are taken away from you. Keep it in mind.

-J.Janke

Block Party 2k5 - Winston Salem

2005-09-17T14:37:00.000-04:00

Yesterday at work I got a call from Jenni asking if I would be too tired after I clocked out to go out and do something. I said no. So when I got off, I was expected to go meet her at Bree & John's house near the downtown area. Unfortunately I clocked out a bit late because one of the other managers called in to explain he couldn't make it in, and Jason had to stay till close. I feel bad for him, he's there all the time. From what I understand though, he's getting a good chunk of a week off coming up pretty soon. So anyway, when I was ready to go, I was asked to go get him some food to carry him through the rest of the night. I gladly accepted.

I arrived at the designated meeting point around 6:00pm, picked up Jenni, and went home to change. When we got back to Bree & John's we had to wait about an hour and a half for everyone else to show up, the roster included Bree's mom and brother, and these three guys that are friends of hers. We all went to eat dinner at a resteraunt called Marshal Street: Smokehouse & Wine Bar. It was great. We had a table reserved outside, so as soon as we arrived we were sitting. I ordered a Rum & Coke and started the evening. We all got our drinks and talked about everything and nothing. By the time the meal came, we were all pretty buzzed. Not drunk mind you, but feeling nice. I ordered another Rum & Coke.

We get downtown to the Block Party around 10:00pm and the place is packed. Walking down Fourth St we made it to the beer line, got our bracelettes, our drinks, and made off to another area just down the street to catch the band that we had intended to see. They were fantastic.

The Avery Brothers ( I hope I'm spelling this right ) were amazing. The band consisted of a standing bassist, a banjo player, and a guitarist. I never actually saw a drummer, but there was a beat, so I can only assume there was one hiding in the back somewhere. They have this really great bluegrass feel to them. It was like some kind of melodic offspring of rock and bluegrass. Great stuff. John and Bree actually know the guys in the band, so they see them quite often. John was saying that they open for a lot of headliners in various venues. String Cheese was one that he knew of for sure, and he was fairly positive that they've opened for Widespread Panic.

Jenni and I got home pretty late, and I got online to play some Gunbound and talk about the evening with a buddy of mine. We had been playing phone tag all night, it was unfortunate we couldn't get in touch while I was actually out doing anything, but we're going to try to catch Gwar together in October, whatever day they come to Ziggy's. Jenni made a couple White Russians. I told her how much to put in the glasses, but she said it didn't "look right" and added double everything (except cream, naturally), needless-to-say, they were vicious and I had to go in the kitchen and cut them a bit.

Thats about it.

-NEWS-
Oh yeah, I about forgot. One of the guys that we met for dinner was telling me how to make this drink called Lemon Drops which I'm sure everyone has had at one point or another. Anyway, he said just take 10 lemons, peal them, then take a fifth of vodka and submerge the lemon skins in the alcohol, and put the mixture in the fridge for like a day. Then you have to ring out the skins or something and put in the fridge again for a little while. Something like that. Sorry I was pretty dizzy by the time I recieved this information. I'm going to try and make it eventually, and I'll let you all know if I fail or not.

-J.Janke

Cocktails

2005-09-14T14:52:00.000-04:00

Yesterday was my first day of work. It went pretty well. Like an idiot I went in wearing a t-shirt and jeans so I could fill out my paper work and start the training. Jason told me that I could stay, but he couldn't let me on the floor to work. I opted to go home and change so that I wouldn't have to sit in the back room and read for the duration of my shift.

I have these dress shoes with some kind of gel souls which im conviced were forged the fires of Mount Doom and made of the splooge of Satan. The souls were apparently designed to cussion the foot, but instead my foot was about to explode after a few minutes of standing. I've resigned to get some new shoes tonight, and set the old ones on fire.

The day was pretty decent. I learned a few things about the computer system, made a couple sales, closed a few deals on some GameInformer subscriptions, blocked a few shelves, wrote a couple signs for release prices, and spent most of the off time just talking about videogames with my new co-workers. It's a pretty relaxed environment. We have the ability to do our job well, take it seriously, and still discuss things at our leisure during down-time.

After work I drove home, my feet were throbbing. I sat down with my dog to watch Seinfeld, and soon after Jenni got home. Eventually we went and bought a few items for celebration. A mixing set, some shot glasses, some cocktail glasses, and assorted beverages to add to our mini-mini-mini bar. I made some drinks. We sat back, relaxed, discussed our day, and caught a buzz.

I caught buddy of mine on GTalk. He was telling me about some program you can download which lets you zoom into areas of the globe, I guess by entering base lat and long coordinates then just zooming in on an image. Then he disappeared, I can only assume he was assassinated.

-J.Janke

Numchucks

2005-09-12T16:54:00.000-04:00

Tomorrow I start my job. I'm a little nervous. It's going to take some getting used to. Having to be somewhere, I mean. I'll have to wake up at the crack of noon in order to fit in my breakfast, daily poo, shower, and letting duchess out to do her buisness. So that I won't be late. Hopefully I won't have to rope tornadoes Pecos Bill style in order to get there safely. I don't want to fuck around with the spawn of Ophelia.

A hurricane (Ophelia) is heading toward my hometown. Actually, from what I understand, it's just kind of sitting out in the ocean getting pissed off. I have a lot of friends that still live there, and a few more that live even closer to the coast in Wilmington. I'm sure most of them are planning to evacuate if the storm gains too much strength. Others I'm sure are buying beer and chips to hold a hurricane party. You know, because they're idiots. Idiots drink beer and eat Doritoes in the face of natural disaster. I think it's a rule. And yes, I've been guilty of this behavior before. Luckily I survived, and grew up enough to realize how overtly stupid it was.

I'm pretty sure I live far enough inland to stay out of real danger. What I'll have a problem with is the hurricane run off. It'll begin as a bad storm here, the sky will be black, tornadoes will spawn, things of that nature, no pun intended. Hopefully I won't have any problems getting to or from work. If Ophelia is anything like Katrina, the people I know better cut their losses and get inland. If all else fails, bring your beer and chips here. Those who are welcome, you know who you are.

In any event, take care everyone.

-J.Janke

Job Interview - Part 2

2005-09-06T16:15:00.000-04:00

I just got off the phone with GameStop. Jason, the store manager, was supposed to call me yesterday. It was Labor Day though, so I didn't sweat the fact that I didn't hear from him. I gave him till about 3 o'clock today to give me a ring and decided I'd just go ahead and call him. When I got him on the phone, he said he had been planning to call me all day, but that they were stocking the store and that he was unable to. He offered me a job though, and I took it. So yay. I start on Tuesday.

Job Interview

2005-08-30T15:29:00.000-04:00

I have a job interview tomorrow. I'm pretty excited. I'll be trying to get a manager position at a GameStop just up the road from where I live. Hopefully my next entry will go something like this: "I got a job today."

Wish me luck, or die by way of ninja assassination. Fear the ninja as he decends from the rafters, as they tend to do.

Anyway, I play a lot of videogames, I speak english, and I can add. I think that covers the prerequisites for a job like this. I really hope I get it.

My Grandpa

2005-08-28T23:07:00.000-04:00

I recieved an email from my dad today informing me that my grandpa, his father, had to have open heart surgery a couple of days ago. I called him to ask about how grandpa was doing and he said that he was recovering well. I called my grandma's cell phone after that. She was at the hospital and grandpa was getting ready to take his bath. She told me that he was doing ok. He was apparently up and about soon after the operation, though I'm not sure when he will be released home.

My grandma told me that prior to the surgery he wasn't even showing symptoms of heart problems. Luckily he had to go in for knee replacement surgery in February and I guess this is when they found that he had a bunch of arteries clogged. It's weird to think about, but it seems as if his knee problems were a blessing in disguise. I'm not exactly sure how far back the problems with his knee go back, but if it wasn't for the need for knee surgery, he could be dead or dying right now. I think it's amazing how one thing can dictate such a big change in fate's course. If there is a higher power, I'd like to thank you now for the course of events that lead up to this surgery. It surely saved my grandpa's life, and for that I am eternally grateful. Though I don't express it with great regularity, I love him so much. He is a great man, casting a shadow of accomplishment that eclipses anything I could ever hope to achieve in my own life. Heres to many more years in this world for the reigning king of ours, the Janke family.

GTalk

2005-08-24T17:33:00.000-04:00

Google has done it again! The company that seems to be redefining everything about internet communication has gone ahead and released a beta version of a new messaging service that is, put mildly, simply amazing. Even in its beta form, it blows away all competition. Below is a link with a full review written by an associate of mine.

GTalk Review

If you use Gmail, check this puppy out, it's well worth a look. If you don't use Gmail, I point and laugh in your general direction.

Playboy - The Mansion (PS2)

2005-08-24T04:09:00.000-04:00

I started playing Playboy: The Mansion last week. At first I wasn't impressed. It seemed to be just a nuded up version of The Sims, which is pretty much exactly what it is. After puting in a few hours, however, I found myself incredibly drawn to the game play. Yes, there are toonified boobies and mature sequences, but that's not really the magnetic quality of this game.

The object is to, of course, make magazines. Everything that goes into making a successful magazine (in the game, i mean) is the real challenge. First of all, you need money. Money comes from several different areas of the game. Naturally the magazine itself is the main source of income, but you can also set up side deals and offer contracts to people you meet. In order to do this, you have to build a buisness relationship with these people. In order to do this effectively you have to learn to entertain your guests, keep them happy, and keep them coming back. This means you have to create a comfortable atmosphere, which includes updating and maintaining your surroundings (i.e. the mansion itself), understanding the different types of personalities of all your guests, and inviting those guests to best suit your needs.

You play the game in the shoes of the legendary Hugh Hefner. Beginning with only $100k, and a basic homestead, you have to launch your magazine and begin building your empire. This means making new friends, new buisness contacts, hiring a staff, and meeting all kinds of women. Eventually you get to see all their jigglies.

As I said before, I'm only a few hours into the game, but I'd highly recommend this title for fans of the simulation genre of game play. Keep in mind though, this isn't a game for children. We don't want anymore bullshit political attention on the videogame market, as it's beginning to cause very real damage.

The game play can seem a bit repetative at first, but you will find yourself swamped with duties soon after you begin. Having to maintain not only your relationship with friends and associates, but making sure their relationships with eachother stay as positive as possible. The challenges mount quickly and can be taken care of fairly easily if you can form a decent strategy to keep the ball rolling. Points such as 'hot' demographics, fame levels, and physical/psychological/astrological stats play a major roll in maintaining your game.

Bottom line: Though comparable to The Sims in many ways, Playboy: The Mansion takes this side of the simulation genre in a whole new direction, even without the mature content. Choose between a mission style game play to learn the ropes and secure a myriad of unlockables, or take on the game in a freeplay mode where you make it work on your own, or fail trying. It really is fun for the whole family, assuming your whole family consists of two drunk fatties living in a basement. Rent it if you're iffy, buy it if you're a fan, but for the love of god...try this game. Unless of course your name is Hillary Clinton...or Tipper Gore.

-An Article by JJanke

Saturday Night Fervor

2005-08-21T13:46:00.000-04:00

Around 10:00 lastnight, Jenni and I got a call from a friend inviting us over for a sit down. The cable was out, so I was asked to find a set of rabbit ears to help the reception. The search ended in failure and we left.

When we arrived, I knocked on the door and heard a howl from inside. Johnathan was apparently teasing their tiny dog by barking and making general dog noises, cracking wise at her expense. Hilarity ensued. Clayton answered the door, patently drunk. When we got in the apartment, Bree was on one end of the couch under blankets, and Johnathan was on the other end completely submerged in blanket. Bree was less than amused and told him to stop acting retarded. Then he mooned her.

We sat down and began discussing movies, popular culture, music, etcetera etcetera. The television was on. Johnathan had rigged a make-shift antennae using two in/out cables, a giant novelty beer bottle, and a coat hanger. It was art. A true testiment to American ingenuity. Much like a safe with a door made to resemble a hanging picture, it seamlessly blurred the lines of form and function. Naturally I laughed hystarically when I saw it.

Later in the evening Clayton's girlfriend returned, he ventured across the hall to his apartment to meet her. He got in trouble for drinking most of her beer. As a result, Johnathan and I went on a trek to find a store open at midnight to replace the missing drinks. It took forever. Mind you, I'm not really familiar with this area of town. An area laden with routine stabbings and a market place to reflect its stature. We drove all over the wasteland known as downtown Winston-Salem. Luckily Johnathan knows the area quite well. Unfotunately he didn't know exactly where to find the fabled midnight beer oasis illustrated in tales of yore. Eventually, after pulling into several barren parking lots, we found an open Harris Teeter. We returned with beer, and were greeted as heroes. Flower peddles and naked virgins rained from the heavens. Sadly, most of them died upon impact.

The night progressed fairly uneventful. Jenni and I returned home around 2:00 am and started to watch Catwoman. Below is a full review of the movie.

- Begin Review -
Catwoman: Stupid.
- End Review -

Anyway, that about wraps up the goings on of lastnight. My passion for life is clearly nonpareil. Eat it.

Rad

2005-08-17T02:13:00.000-04:00

I found this logo last week from a company overseas. I dont speak German, but I know 'heizung' means 'heating'. Anyway, I'm easily amused and it has my last name in it, so I thought it was rad.

Horimono

2005-08-14T22:59:00.000-04:00

I'd like a new tattoo. In looking through designs and various tattoo styles and backgrounds, I found a neat show on the National Geographic channel discussing these topics. One of which that I found very interesting is the Japanese art of Horimono, which is a tattoo divoted to almost every inch of the body, leaving only the hands, feet, and sometimes the front of the chest blank.

The Yakuza are famous, if not infamous for having these highly detailed, full body works of art. The history, as much as I've read anyway, is really neat as far as the Japanese crime organization goes. But moreso, the artists themselves that apply these tattoos are the real prize of my study. One such artist who is actually a legend in the trade, Horiyoshi, comes from a long line of Horimono grandmasters (all taking the artist name HoriYoshi), and is still alive, kicking, and practicing his trade in Japan this day.

The application of Horimono usually takes many years to complete, and can cost tens of thousands of dollars before it is complete. This of course is not the real reason behind getting one of these masterpieces. To endure the pain, and time it takes to finish a piece is the real prize for most of those who undergo the process. It's amazing to me that you can look at a piece as it grows, and in a lot of ways they grow in the same patterns and patches of skin. Before completion you may see the back finished, the artwork crawling over the the shoulders and around the lats, resting on the left and right chest, leaving the center alone. The work seems to slither its way down the arms, stopping perfectly linear at the wrists. The same goes for the legs down to the ankles, and the chest up to the neck. The reason for this is simple, most of the wearers of these fantastically designed and detailed artworks will never show them off. It's hard for a westerner such as myself to understand the idea of going through so much suffering and time to never actually share the finished piece with anyone. The blank points are strategically placed so that the tattoo can easily be concealed by clothing.

From what I understand, tattoos are viewed negatively by the majority of those in Japanese society. Those who see someone with a tattoo will sometimes put as much distance between theirself and the wearer as they possibly can, understanding the implications of the body art. A long time ago, those running the Japanese prison system began placing tattoos on those convicted of crimes, mainly on the arms and forehead. The tattoos held with them the cause of their imprisonment. For example, if someone was placed in prison for murder, there would be a tattoo signifying murder (if not the actual kangi for "murder") on their forehead. This was so, again...if I'm not mistaken, when they were released, those in society would know what kind of people they were dealing with. So a lot of the inmates upon release would get the markings covered by, or incorperated into an often beautiful new tattoo. This is only a modest origin of what was to become an awe inspiring artform. This is probably why the Yakuza are most recognized as the wearers of these things.

Not only the application of these marks takes a long long time, but the practice takes a very long time to develope. An apprentice would spend many years with no real benefit (other than the craft itself) to learn the trade. There is a Japanese expression that explains this: "Ishi no ue ni mo sannen" which translates to "three years on a rock", according to a site devoted to Horiyoshi III. Which goes far beyond the application and study of Horimono. Masters have been passing this ideal down to apprentices for hundreds of years in all artforms and crafts. The idea is that someone must be willing to sacrafice years of their life with no tangible reward and no real sense of progress in order to learn a substantial craft, artform, what-have-you.

It's just amazing to me. Every aspect of this artform amazes me. It makes me think back to a few posts ago when I mentioned I was working for hours on fixing a problem on this site. I felt like I went around and around and after hours of work, I came up with no real progress, other than learning what I did wrong. I put in hours and had literally nothing to show for it, and I honestly felt somewhat defeated. I couldnt imagine puting years of my life into something and never seeing the progress work for me, never being able to show that progress off, never being recognized for that which I have accomplished. I guess it just illustrates the differences in our societies. It's not to say that these differences makes any one society better than the other. But I think that we all have something to learn. It helps me to understand that different doesn't always mean wrong, or right. Different is just different. As a girl I knew used to say - "Variety is the spice of life.", how very very true.

A Title

2005-08-08T14:35:00.000-04:00

A girl named Meg is visiting from New York for the next week. My friends and I met her on a multi-player, internet game called Gunbound over a year ago, and have been friends ever since. She's actually in my clan now, but we all used to be in one clan a while back.

She will be visiting till next Sunday. Sadly I probably will not be able to make it back to Richlands to see her before she leaves, which kind of blows. I'm going to see if JWhite and Meg will come here on Wednsday through Friday so I can atleast meet her in person. Eitherway, I hope she has a great time on her trip, whether I get to see her or not.

I really wanted her and Jenni to meet too. They'd probably like eachother a lot. I guess we'll see what happens.

I had a pretty uneventful weekend. Friday we went to Johns for a few hours. His neighbor found a dog running around outside, and is keeping her until he gets into contact with her 'parents'. It's this really cute Jack Russell that he's decided to call She-Ra. The dog is brilliant. You could probably point at her and say "backflip", and she'd probably do it, and if not, she'd probably atleast tilt her head. She seemed very receptive. All she wants to do is dance...dance.

Clearly this is the end of this post.

HALF-LIFE 2

2005-08-03T17:40:00.000-04:00

Well, I beat Half-Life 2 a few minutes ago, and I'm not going to do a full review. The graphics were great, physics were great, story was mediocre, ending was shitty. I liked the first one a lot better. I guess the main points with this game are its fantastic graphics and physics engines, and the implimention of the relatively new 'ragdoll' effect. The game opened up a new doorway for Valve/Steam's multi-player world, including Counter-Strike. But if you're like me and more into the single player aspect of such games, you might be a little disappointed. All in all it was an entertaining game, but I really was expecting more near the end. I guess thats about it.

Confoozled

2005-08-03T12:23:00.000-04:00

I was messing around in the HTML editor trying to figure out a way to get rid of that comments link that appears under each post, earlier today. Naturally I tried the settings first, using the 'hide' option under Comments. Unfortunately this just killed the link to the comments page, but left the actual link still on the page.

So I went into the HTML editor and was searching for the line that would make it disappear. I found it eventually, feeling around in the dark, having no clue what I'm actually doing. I deleted a few lines of the text. I deleted the entire */comments section, as a matter of fact. This worked, but it left that irritating little pencil graphic under all the posts.

So I went back into the HTML editor and tried to find the root of this problem. Eventually I started finding things that looked like they might very well have something to do with it. So I began killing these lines and previewing the blog. On the preview everything looked super, comments link was gone, pencil was gone. Super. But the preview was LIES!

FUCK~!

Soon realizing that I had just deleted several lines of HTML that had nothing to do with the problem, I loaded my back up file in notepad to check and see what I was missing. It took me a while, but I finally, after matching every single line up, had everything back to normal. Only problem was that things were still missing. I checked and rechecked the lines, and everytime came to the same conclusion. That I had infact replaced all the missing information.

Remembering what started all this, I figured I'd go back to settings and see if taking the comment settings off 'hide' would fix the problem. It was the only thing I could think of that could be screwing it up. It was.

It felt nice figuring out the problem. And now I'm back exactly where I started. Zero progress, and yet I learned something. Neat.

I Think I'm Hungry

2005-08-02T11:40:00.000-04:00

It's been a long night. Long night and day as a matter of fact. I havn't slept in quite some time. It's interesting the things that go through your mind when you've neglected sleep. Thoughts seem to shoot through your mind as if slicked by oil. As soon as you have them, you forget them. You might start to hear things. Strange things. Knocking sounds might come from the windows or from somewhere underneath the floor. You may hear high pitched squeeling coming from your computer monitor. The trouble isn't deciding whether you actually hear something. The trouble is deciding if you're in any immediate danger. Though startled, you'll weigh the factors that you have to work with. Does Bigfoot really exist, and if so, is it really necessary for me to move if he shows up? What if he's like Harry, from Harry and the Hendersons? What if he just wants some cheeseburgers? Then you start thinking about cheeseburgers and your whole train of thought changes. Or atleast thats how it works for me.

Still Wondering...

2005-07-30T20:01:00.000-04:00

Okay, I decided the whole invisible link thing had to go. It was just too confusing to me, and I'm a fucking genius, so I know all of you were drooling wondering what the hell was going on.

I just got back from the gas station to pick up a Starbucks - Doubleshot Espresso & Cream and a pack of smokes. If you havn't got your health, what do you have? That's right, hyper-activity and lungs coated in tar.

My dog shit on the floor while I was sleeping this morning. It was probably the biggest dog turd I've ever seen in my life. I went to grab some paper towels and when I got back to the massive pile I laughed at myself via inner monologue and stated quite matter of factly, "You're kidding, right?". I had to use a piece of notebook paper. I actually considered just setting it on fire, Drew Barrymore style.

My sister informed me that the picture at the bottom of the last post was the day I was sunburned at the pool because noone put sunscreen on me. It's comforting to know that I was introduced to dermal torture at an early age. Keep in mind, I'm a red head. How is it possible that I was ever let outside without six coats of sunscreen slathered all over my young body? You may see this as neglect, but I don't. The only explaination is that my parents knew I was to become a great ninja, and were merely training my flesh to withstand bullets.

Testing...one...two...

2005-07-30T09:21:00.000-04:00

My name is JJanke. This is my new blog. I've decided to leave Modblog and join Google's blogging communitee because Modblog is just getting old. It's always down, the administrators take themselves way too seriously, and the over-all communitee there reminds me of highschool. I dispise "cool" people. Elitists are fun to throw things at.

I guess the first thing I should point out is that I am a really badass ninja. For the most part I just run around doing backflips and shooting laser beams out of my eyes because I can. I can also fly and walk on water, but I rarely ever do. I'm not a show-boat. When I'm feeling froggy, I just count to ten, and ponder the age old question - What Would Chuck Norris Do? Okay, that was stupid. On to more serious matters.

I can knock a small child out with one punch. Not that I've tried, I'm just confident in my skill.

I've taken the liberty of augmenting this minimal template slightly, to make it even more minimal. I don't like websites that are flashy for the sake of being flashy, and I have no reason to be flashy. Nor do I have the ability. If you're a badass webmaster, I simply don't care. Can you shoot laser beams out of your eyes? I didn't think so.

Anyway, I'm going to try and keep this site as minimal as I possibly can. The links will be invisible until you hover your curser over them, because I just don't like looking at links all over my blog. The dots are nice though, but I can't figure out how to get rid of them. I'd like to replace the dots that indicate a link with skulls or something rad like that. If anyone is interested in contacting me at some point, my contact information will remain at the bottom of the page. I just request that if you're going to email me [I doubt anyone will have a reason to], that you keep it short, to the point, and put a personalized subject in it, so it doesn't float it's way to my spam folder. I'd hate to miss your banter, comments, complaints, etc.

I will be making the transition from Modblog over the next couple weeks. I may or may not be updating that often within that time frame. I may also decide to just neglect the shit out of my old blog and just focus on this one. I have no idea.

In the right-hand column under the rabbit [whom I've named Norman S. Fitzpatrick III], I am just listing blog links, for now. My old blog is among them. I actually have two old blogs on the list. Tobor, my first blog ever [which was banned for reasons that I don't care to go into... frankly, I just end up looking like a douche at the end of the story], and Tobor2, which is my current blog that I'm migrating from. Take a look if you're interested. But trust me, if you are interested, you won't be for long.

It's going to take some getting used to, but I'm really looking forward to digging my teeth into this site, and possibly learning a few new things about HTML while at the same time honing my basic writing skills. The previous mind numbing run-on sentence was made possible by the North Carolina Board of Education. Needless-to-say, I really have no idea what I'm doing. I know a few basic HTML tags and have a couple friends that really know their stuff, and that are always willing to help. So hopefully this will be a rewarding experience, and maybe I'll gain a small audience and make a few new friends in the process.

I guess that about does it for introductions.

In the immortal words of Dr. Emmett Brown, "...1.21 gigawatts!"